July 11th, 2016
Today, I was tending the garden. I noticed that many of the flowers on our hanging plants were drying up from the intense sunlight. I started plucking the dried out flowers to make room for new growth. There are loads of buds ready to bloom. Our flowers will look amazing by the end of the week. I was never good with flowers in the past. I gave them too much water and never pruned them. I feared that I would remove too much and kill the plant. The earth would get mouldy and no new flowers would grow because the entire plant was packed with dead flowers. My husband showed me how to prune plants and flowers the first year we lived at this home. His grandmother had taught him the art of pruning in her rose garden in England.
As I pruned today, I thought about the parallels between my gardening style and my habits. I hang on to stuff way too long. I have a lot of clothing that I wore when I was a teenager. I no longer have the body of a teenager but I am attached to the clothing. Each dress has a story, a fun memory associated with it. I hold onto books and paperwork-scraps of paper with notes, insights from experiences or books and, awesome quotes.
I was thinking about the importance of pruning in life in general. At any given time, we can pretty much fill a few boxes with items we have outgrown or simply haven't used recently. Having a cluttered home feels heavy and drains our energy.
There are people in our lives who no longer belong there. You may need to let go of a spouse, a friend, a colleague or a relative. It can be painful to end a relationship even if it's long overdue. You are inflicting pain on another person and, a break-up entails conflict which can feel scary and uncomfortable. If that person is part of a group of friends, you may also fear the backlash from other members of that group as a result of your pruning.
I often meet people who need to change careers. They have been in the same job for ten years, they used to love it but they no longer care about it, they resent it and feel run down every day when they have to go to work.
Like me, you may need to prune your closet and keep only the clothing that still represents who you are then donate the rest.
Activities can also be pruned. Look at your schedule and put an "x" on all the items in your calendar that don't need to be there. We tend to fill our schedules and we rarely have time to assess these activities later on to see if they are still meaningful to us.
Life is meant to be savoured. How much of your life do you love? I remember when owning and pruning Bonzai trees were a trend. You had to know what to cut out and what to leave in. Our lives are like that. Sometimes we need to stop and examine our lives. We can prune away the items that are weighing us down and the people who are draining our energy. By paying attention to how much time we devote to activities we no longer enjoy compared to what lights us up, we can see what needs to go. Pruning our lives, like Bonzai trees, is an art. We need to know what fills us up and what empties us and act accordingly.
If you're curious, grab a piece of paper and divide it into two columns. Write a heading for each column; Fills Me, Empties Me. Then, list all the people and activities that fit into each column. You may be surprised by how uneven your columns are or by who and what ends up where. Happy pruning!
Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org
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