October 13th, 2016
Tomorrow is my daughter's eighth birthday. Both my daughters will stay home to celebrate. I will be eating cake, playing with her new toys, going out for lunch and taking lots of photos so my next post will be on Monday.
Today's post is about perseverance. There are so many sayings like: "Jump and the net will appear" or "Follow your heart and the money will come". I have followed my heart and I jumped without hesitation. Guess what? There was no net or money. However, I get to do what I love every day. This includes taking care of my family, participating in activities that contribute to my community and developing my skills as a writer, public speaker and art therapist. I also enjoy a better work-life balance now that I am my own employer.
This post was inspired by a 100 year old artist named Carmen Herrera. She was born in Havana, Cuba but spent a great deal of her life in New York. Her father was the founder of a newspaper, El Mundo, and her mother was a journalist. Carmen was creating innovative, minimalist art in the 50s along with Frank Stella. As a matter of fact, her geometric shapes and use of colour and contrasts were unparalleled. Why haven't you heard about this artist before now? She's a woman and, in the 50s, she was not included in art shows because of her gender. I
n the documentary, The 100 Years Show, Carmen recalls a moment when she met a woman who was the curator for an art gallery. A friend assured Carmen that this curator admired her work. Carmen went to see this woman, hoping to be included in an art show. This woman explained that she did love her work but she couldn't include a female artist in her exhibits. This shocked Carmen because it was another woman who was placing limitations on her.
Carmen married a photographer who encouraged Carmen's creativity and fully believed that her work would be recognized one day. They were great friends. He passed away at the age of 100 after years of suffering from dementia, becoming dependent on Carmen for his care. Carmen has created every day, finding purpose in "putting order in a chaotic world". No one was buying her art but she created for herself. She created because she simply had to do it. That is true passion.
It turns out, her husband was right. People started to recognize her talent and she is now selling her art, included in art shows, part of the collection in a dozen art galleries and, interviewed in various magazines and newspapers. Starting in 2002, she has enjoyed being a recognized and celebrated artist. While it saddens her that her husband never got to see her efforts pay off, she is grateful for the income. It allows her to stay at home and afford the supports she needs such as an art assistant, a physiotherapist and a chef.
Her documentary is short but inspiring. For all of you who have worked hard and have yet to reap the rewards of your labour, there is hope. Just keep doing what you love. Trust that you are where you are meant to be and, perhaps, one day when you least expect it, your moment will come. Hopefully, you won't be 100 years old when it does.
Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org
Showing posts with label equality. Show all posts
Showing posts with label equality. Show all posts
Thursday, 13 October 2016
Friday, 7 October 2016
Women's Worth
October 7th, 2016
Yesterday was a packed day! So much has happened since I posted my invitation to mothers everywhere and anywhere to share their stories. I received messages on Facebook from women I knew. I also received e-mails from complete strangers giving me a sneak peek at their experiences.
This morning, I met with my friend Chris. We try to go for a walk every Friday. She was telling me that she is noticing a great deal of loneliness and self doubt in many women in their 40s. This worries her. This was an interesting comment because I was thinking about self-doubt this morning as I prepared for my day. I have a list of women who came forward to participate in my Mommy Monologues project. Every woman wrote something along the lines of; "I don't know if you'll want my story in your book but here's what happened to me and I would be willing to tell you all about it if you want to hear it". These women had all been through important experiences to share yet their first thought was that I might not want to include their story.
This echoed another experience I've had in individual work with women. They will ask me for a smaller piece of paper because they don't want to take up that much space. They fear making a mess in my shop and immediately clean up after themselves. They warn me not to pour out too much paint into their tray because they don't want to waste products.
When I am working in groups, the women praise the other participants. "Wow, you are so strong, I couldn't have done that". or "Are you kidding me, you are amazing, I haven't done anything". This dance of praising others while humbling ourselves is present in every group I run. Why is it so difficult to recognize and affirm our worth?
As Chris and I discussed this loss of worth, we talked about the power dynamics in relationships where the man is the main breadwinner. If you pause your career for a few years to take care of your children, you work very hard every day completing invisible tasks; cooking, laundry, cleaning, grocery shopping, planning, organizing etc but you are not paid for any of these tasks, they need to repeated over and over again and, after a while, people stop appreciating them, they take you for granted. You also stop noticing all the things you do. If you were a career woman, you may feel the loss of earning your own income and of feeling independent. If your role is not valued, you forget your worth and downplay all the actions you take every day within your role. You become invisible.
You are more than the money you make. You are a worthwhile person just for being you. I love Louise Hay's mirror work. She asks her clients to sit in front of a full length mirror and practice saying kind things to themselves. Try it out. Sit in front of the biggest mirror you can find and express your love and respect for yourself. Louise encourages women to say their name followed by "I Love You"! Write a list of your strengths and qualities (at least ten) and say to yourself, "I am..." as you go through each one. If you can't come up with ten strengths and qualities, ask your loved ones to help with your list. You might be surprised by what they say.
Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org
Yesterday was a packed day! So much has happened since I posted my invitation to mothers everywhere and anywhere to share their stories. I received messages on Facebook from women I knew. I also received e-mails from complete strangers giving me a sneak peek at their experiences.
This morning, I met with my friend Chris. We try to go for a walk every Friday. She was telling me that she is noticing a great deal of loneliness and self doubt in many women in their 40s. This worries her. This was an interesting comment because I was thinking about self-doubt this morning as I prepared for my day. I have a list of women who came forward to participate in my Mommy Monologues project. Every woman wrote something along the lines of; "I don't know if you'll want my story in your book but here's what happened to me and I would be willing to tell you all about it if you want to hear it". These women had all been through important experiences to share yet their first thought was that I might not want to include their story.
This echoed another experience I've had in individual work with women. They will ask me for a smaller piece of paper because they don't want to take up that much space. They fear making a mess in my shop and immediately clean up after themselves. They warn me not to pour out too much paint into their tray because they don't want to waste products.
When I am working in groups, the women praise the other participants. "Wow, you are so strong, I couldn't have done that". or "Are you kidding me, you are amazing, I haven't done anything". This dance of praising others while humbling ourselves is present in every group I run. Why is it so difficult to recognize and affirm our worth?
As Chris and I discussed this loss of worth, we talked about the power dynamics in relationships where the man is the main breadwinner. If you pause your career for a few years to take care of your children, you work very hard every day completing invisible tasks; cooking, laundry, cleaning, grocery shopping, planning, organizing etc but you are not paid for any of these tasks, they need to repeated over and over again and, after a while, people stop appreciating them, they take you for granted. You also stop noticing all the things you do. If you were a career woman, you may feel the loss of earning your own income and of feeling independent. If your role is not valued, you forget your worth and downplay all the actions you take every day within your role. You become invisible.
You are more than the money you make. You are a worthwhile person just for being you. I love Louise Hay's mirror work. She asks her clients to sit in front of a full length mirror and practice saying kind things to themselves. Try it out. Sit in front of the biggest mirror you can find and express your love and respect for yourself. Louise encourages women to say their name followed by "I Love You"! Write a list of your strengths and qualities (at least ten) and say to yourself, "I am..." as you go through each one. If you can't come up with ten strengths and qualities, ask your loved ones to help with your list. You might be surprised by what they say.
Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org
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