November 3rd, 2016
On Monday, like every other parent, we took our children trick or treating. They got dressed up, applied their face make-up and grabbed a pillow case. We visited our friends' houses first then we headed out to the homes of strangers.
As the children walked from door to door, we bumped into people we know from the community. I got to meet the children of some adults I know through business. The girls got to meet the parents of children they know from school or gymnastics.
As the girls collected candy, we listened to make sure they said thank you. We watched them interacting with adults of all ages and abilities. They pet dogs and cats, talked about their costumes and asked some adults who were dressed-up what they were dressed as.
There is a festive mood in the air as children and their parents walk freely through the streets, enjoying the experience, showing off their costumes, gathering candy like gold and meeting the neighbours.
Recently, when I attended Sources of Strength training, we talked about the resilience of people in Latin America. Two of the factors responsible for this resilience are 1) a sense of belonging to their community and, 2) close ties to their family.
My husband and I are lucky. We get to work from home. This means we spend more time with our children than most people. I was thinking about occasions like Halloween when we get to connect with our community. I like taking the girls to Canada Day celebrations, Pirate Day, Ribfest, the Santa Parade and other local celebrations. We meet local business owners and bump into acquaintances and friends from the community. Going to Gymnastics each week is also an opportunity to get to know other families. We have a Summer Bash every year where we invite the girls' friends and their families. They spend most of the evening in the pool but we get to mingle with parents and expand our circle of friendships.
I believe we would be stronger as a community and as families if there were more opportunities to socialize like block parties, BBQs, game nights and family days. We have many empty buildings in this community. They could be transformed into indoor pools, movie theatres and games areas. I feel safer living in a connected community where my children and I know the names of our neighbours. Don't you?
Showing posts with label bonding. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bonding. Show all posts
Thursday, 3 November 2016
Friday, 17 June 2016
Father's Day
June 17th, 2016
I never knew my father. As a child, on Father's Day I either created a card for my uncle Jack or my grandfather. It was normal for me, no one made a big deal out of it so it didn't bother me. When my husband and I got married, my uncle Jack walked me down the aisle. It was a special moment that I will treasure forever.
My husband did know his father. I don't think he knew him well because he was rarely home, and when he was, there was violence, tension and, nine months later, a new sibling.
When we had our first child, I saw the most amazing look on my husband's face. I had lost a lot of blood and required stitching so no one paid attention to him. He was walking around with our daughter all bundled up, showing her off. Apparently, he wasn't supposed to do that but by the time the nurses noticed he had gotten around the unit and everyone had met Molly. I have a photo of Vincent holding Molly in his arms, beaming with pride.
Fatherhood was challenging for my husband at first. He had plenty of negative role models and he desperately wanted to be a good dad. I had no idea what dads did on a daily basis. I was close to my uncle Jack, my grandfather and my Godfather but I didn't live with them so I had no clue how a father interacts with his daughter day to day.
Over time, Vincent found his own way to bond with our daughters but their relationship didn't bloom until the girls were older. Now, he is known for his silliness. He makes the girls laugh. They know they can depend on him- he does what he says and shows up when he's supposed to. He is very affectionate and always kisses their booboos. He tells them they are "clever" and that he loves them. He is also more interested in fashion than I am. He's a stylist so he knows what is in and what isn't. He buys the girls cool outfits and accessories. I am clueless when it comes to fashion. I don't know or care what's in and I don't wear accessories (or makeup for that matter).
Father's Day was never really special to me before but, now that the children and I are celebrating my husband, it has a new meaning for me. I am proud that my children will grow up knowing their father and that he is a positive influence in their lives. I was shopping for cards from my children and from myself for my husband and it struck me how different Father's Day cards are from Mother's Day cards. The messages for dads are about feeling safe, cared for and protected. The Mother's Day cards are more about being nurtured and loved. Both roles are important. We balance each other out.
Happy Father's Day to all the dads out there, spending time with their children, working hard, being a great role model and source of love for the next generation!
Anne Walsh
www.artsnoul.org
I never knew my father. As a child, on Father's Day I either created a card for my uncle Jack or my grandfather. It was normal for me, no one made a big deal out of it so it didn't bother me. When my husband and I got married, my uncle Jack walked me down the aisle. It was a special moment that I will treasure forever.
My husband did know his father. I don't think he knew him well because he was rarely home, and when he was, there was violence, tension and, nine months later, a new sibling.
When we had our first child, I saw the most amazing look on my husband's face. I had lost a lot of blood and required stitching so no one paid attention to him. He was walking around with our daughter all bundled up, showing her off. Apparently, he wasn't supposed to do that but by the time the nurses noticed he had gotten around the unit and everyone had met Molly. I have a photo of Vincent holding Molly in his arms, beaming with pride.
Fatherhood was challenging for my husband at first. He had plenty of negative role models and he desperately wanted to be a good dad. I had no idea what dads did on a daily basis. I was close to my uncle Jack, my grandfather and my Godfather but I didn't live with them so I had no clue how a father interacts with his daughter day to day.
Over time, Vincent found his own way to bond with our daughters but their relationship didn't bloom until the girls were older. Now, he is known for his silliness. He makes the girls laugh. They know they can depend on him- he does what he says and shows up when he's supposed to. He is very affectionate and always kisses their booboos. He tells them they are "clever" and that he loves them. He is also more interested in fashion than I am. He's a stylist so he knows what is in and what isn't. He buys the girls cool outfits and accessories. I am clueless when it comes to fashion. I don't know or care what's in and I don't wear accessories (or makeup for that matter).
Father's Day was never really special to me before but, now that the children and I are celebrating my husband, it has a new meaning for me. I am proud that my children will grow up knowing their father and that he is a positive influence in their lives. I was shopping for cards from my children and from myself for my husband and it struck me how different Father's Day cards are from Mother's Day cards. The messages for dads are about feeling safe, cared for and protected. The Mother's Day cards are more about being nurtured and loved. Both roles are important. We balance each other out.
Happy Father's Day to all the dads out there, spending time with their children, working hard, being a great role model and source of love for the next generation!
Anne Walsh
www.artsnoul.org
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