Showing posts with label development. Show all posts
Showing posts with label development. Show all posts

Thursday, 3 November 2016

Halloween and our Sense of Community

November 3rd, 2016

On Monday, like every other parent, we took our children trick or treating. They got dressed up, applied their face make-up and grabbed a pillow case. We visited our friends' houses first then we headed out to the homes of strangers.

As the children walked from door to door, we bumped into people we know from the community. I got to meet the children of some adults I know through business. The girls got to meet the parents of children they know from school or gymnastics.

As the girls collected candy, we listened to make sure they said thank you. We watched them interacting with adults of all ages and abilities. They pet dogs and cats, talked about their costumes and asked some adults who were dressed-up what they were dressed as.

There is a festive mood in the air as children and their parents walk freely through the streets, enjoying the experience, showing off their costumes, gathering candy like gold and meeting the neighbours.

Recently, when I attended Sources of Strength training, we talked about the resilience of people in Latin America. Two of the factors responsible for this resilience are 1) a sense of belonging to their community and, 2) close ties to their family.

My husband and I are lucky. We get to work from home. This means we spend more time with our children than most people. I was thinking about occasions like Halloween when we get to connect with our community. I like taking the girls to Canada Day celebrations, Pirate Day, Ribfest, the Santa Parade and other local celebrations. We meet local business owners and bump into acquaintances and friends from the community. Going to Gymnastics each week is also an opportunity to get to know other families. We have a Summer Bash every year where we invite the girls' friends and their families. They spend most of the evening in the pool but we get to mingle with parents and expand our circle of friendships.

I believe we would be stronger as a community and as families if there were more opportunities to socialize like block parties, BBQs, game nights and family days. We have many empty buildings in this community. They could be transformed into indoor pools, movie theatres and games areas. I feel safer living in a connected community where my children and I know the names of our neighbours. Don't you?

Monday, 6 June 2016

It Takes A Village

June 6th, 2016

We've all heard the expression: "It takes a village to raise a child". However, I have been thinking a lot lately about the power of community as an entrepreneur.

I was raised in the city and, as a child, I got to know the kids in my neighbourhood but the adults didn't mingle unless their children were friends. You could live three years within spitting distance of your neighbours and never get to know them. They were a mystery-their name, occupation, secrets, aspirations etc.

When I moved to the country, one of the things I loved was the way everyone seemed to know each other. Initially it's challenging because you are an outsider but as people see you around, as you get involved with various groups, as you cross paths, you forge connections and people and places become familiar. You reach a comfort level and a feeling of belonging. My children hate running errands with me because we bump into people I know and I like to chat which prolongs each errand much to their chagrin.

As an entrepreneur, sometimes, your biggest struggle is getting people to try your product or service. Word of mouth is a powerful tool in a rural community but only if someone has tried your services. There are so many expenses involved in starting a business-website, business cards, social media, marketing, inventory, staff, taxes, professional memberships, cell phone and e-mail accounts just to name a few. The advantage of being a part of a small community is you will find that many people are willing to connect you with the right resource and you help each other out.

I have been so fortunate to meet the right people who have connected me to amazing professionals. This past year has been focused primarily on working with children and teenagers within the school system. I was lucky that Mme Graham, then a Grade 3 teacher, allowed me to offer my creativity workshops to her students. Shelley Mitchell connected me to Oxford-on-Rideau Public School when they were searching for someone to run a few after-school art programs in November and December 2014. Tia Akse introduced me to Meredith Luce who became the illustrator of my deck of cards and books. My walking buddy, Chris Turnbull, brought Andrew McManaman, a first-year film student, into my life just when I needed someone to film my workshops. Mandy Moodie at Classic Graphics is super talented and constantly sets up posters or documents for me so they look professional. Maggie Boyer and David Shanahan empowered me to write a bunch of articles on topics of interest to me. Their paper, The NG Times, connected me to this community in a way I had never experienced and, they helped me publish my first book which gave me the confidence to write a second one. Jocelyne Elliott invited me into her Grade 2 class for my Have You Hugged Your Alien? workshop and sang my praises at the parent council. The Parent Council applied for funding so I could develop three workshops to improve communication among family members. The grant was approved and I had the pleasure of meeting so many local parents and children in the process. Bev Illauq invited me to the Catholic District School Board Community Partner Day two years ago. This led to me meeting Michelle Neville who has been a great resource and liaison for me. Anita Mitra, a teacher at the Smiths Falls District High School welcomed me into her High Arts program for a half day stress management workshop with her talented students. The North Grenville Public Library who is hosting my book launch. Jim Beveridge at B&H Your Community Grocer who not only supplies the empty boxes to organize my supplies for workshops but who has also offered to display my books for sale in his store at no cost to me. Are you out of breath yet?

As an entrepreneur, you depend on people to give you a chance, to tell others about your business, to sing your praises and to refer clients to you. You also grow as a business when people use local services and help each other out. I am so grateful to live in a rural community where people promote one another and celebrate each other's successes. Thank you Kemptville for your support and encouragement! I couldn't have made it this far without you.

Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org

Tuesday, 24 May 2016

Friendships

May 24th, 2016

What did you do over the long weekend? We had amazing weather! We seem to have suddenly fallen into summer. We ate outdoors and the trampoline got plenty of use and, we hung out at Baxter's Beach for the first time this season. The Ice Cream Float was out, that is the name of a boat. It belongs to a super sweet man who crosses the river from his home to Baxter's Beach in his boat in order to sell ice cream to hoards of overheated and eagerly awaiting children. The beach is my zone and I could spend the entire day (my whole life) there. My children usually want to go home after a few hours. Sigh!

I was thinking about friendships over the weekend. My youngest daughter had her friend Ruby over to the house. They are both seven years old and were so excited to spend time together. They created masterpieces at our dining room table then had some lunch while watching Teen Titans. They spent a good 30 minutes on the trampoline then I challenged them with a treasure hunt. They had to jump rope, pick flowers from our property, do somersaults across the lawn, race on bouncy balls and swing to another galaxy on our swing set. They played with dolls for a while then they drew with chalk on the back deck. They were having a great time. By the time Ruby's Mom came over to pick her up, Ruby wanted to sleep over. My daughters and her had planned their whole evening while they drew flowers and rainbows all over the deck. When her mother said no, Ruby was very disappointed. My eldest daughter is 10 years old but she had played with my youngest and her friend and they had quickly bonded. I truly enjoyed our day. I love being around young ones because they are in the moment, savouring each activity, participating fully. They love each other so deeply and their friendships are so precious. It's really heartwarming.

That evening, my husband set out to meet a friend of his who was visiting from Norway. They have been friends for a long time. They don't see each other often, due to distance, but when they spend time together it's as if no time has elapsed. They both had children later in life and married in the same year. Becoming fathers has changed them both, deepening their friendship. He came home the next morning seeming happier and even more appreciative of our daughters. I caught a glimpse of him holding our youngest daughter, smiling, content.

My husband has also developed a new relationship recently with the father of one of our eldest daughter's friends. They both love music and beer and they are like two children when they get together, joking, excited and happy. This has been a great friendship for them. They go out every two weeks on their "Bro-date". I can tell they look forward to it and they both get something out of it. I am glad that they have found each other.

I meet a friend of mine every week. We go for walks and we talk about our lives, our challenges, our aspirations and the really cool people we have met. I look forward to our walks because it is great exercise for me and I feel great afterwards. However, I mostly enjoy our time together. Our conversations make me think and force me to view the world in a different way. Last week, another lady I had met through volunteering at my daughter's school asked if she could join us. I look forward to getting to know her. She is one of those people who has an open face, friendly, honest and kind. I am excited for this week's walk. I also stay in touch with friends from previous phases of my life. We catch up on Facebook, via e-mail or, if they are in Ottawa, we connect for coffee once in a while. Again, it feels as though no time has elapsed every time we meet.

Seeing my friends fills me up. I have more energy, I am more patient with my husband and children after a date with a friend and, I connect with different parts of myself through my friendships. Some friends are more intellectual, we will bounce ideas off one another and grow in awareness together. Other friends are silly and naughty and they teach me to relax and enjoy my life. My creative friends set me on fire. I leave our meet ups feeling energized and motivated to express myself in bold new ways.

I can see how my daughters learn about themselves through friendships as well. They learn to communicate, share and empathize. They feel special because this person wants to be their friend. They get a sense of belonging and they identify with what they have in common whether that's a love of gymnastics, a favourite colour or having long blond hair.

Friendships are so important for us as human beings. I wanted to celebrate the role of friendships in today's post. If you don't have a few close friends, participate in activities you enjoy in order to meet like-minded people. Don't be afraid to approach people and ask them if they'd like to grab a coffee or go for a walk. There are lots of fascinating people out there just waiting to be discovered, like you.

Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org

Thursday, 28 January 2016

The Impact of Technology on our Children

January 28th, 2016

A few weeks ago, my eldest daughter, age 10, had a sleepover party for her birthday. I wrote a post about my reaction to the use of technology by her friends during the sleepover. My daughters were introduced to new apps during the party and I noticed an increase in their use of technology. This alarmed me because we have always done fun activities together after school. We do art, cook, do each other's nails and play hang man. Sometimes, if the weather cooperates, we play on our snow hill or toboggan out back. We also like to play ball with our lab who will run up the stairs to chase her ball hundreds of times. She also likes to play hide and seek. We hide while she is chasing her ball and she has to find us. The girls always laugh, making it easy for the dog.

Suddenly, nothing I suggested interested my daughters. They wanted to "join worlds" on Minecraft or play with Angela, a cat that matures as you play her app. I had to unplug their technology. They were very upset with me. They stomped off then hung around bored but refusing to engage in any activities with me. They sulked. I even heard one of my daughters crying. What?! Over a computer? At supper, we played headbands. The girls chose what each of us would be and they started to giggle. They decided my husband would be Iggle Piggle. Haha! Then each of our daughters showed us how to do a craft they had learned at school......and just like that, we had our girls back. That was scary.

At my Neurofeedback appointment on Monday, I talked to Carol about this experience. She made a comment that stuck with me. The games are stimulating pleasure centres. I wondered if spending a lot of time on technology pre-disposed the brain to become addicted. If your brain's pleasure centre is stimulated for hours at a time, can real life be anything but boring? What if your brain needs more and more immediate gratification to meet its needs? Wouldn't that lead to exploring sex and drugs in order to create the same response? This freaked me out. I did some digging and here is what I found:

In an article titled, 11 Reasons Why Children Under the Age of 12 Should Not Use Handheld Devices, I learned that the brain grows very quickly in childhood up to the age of 21. "Overexposure to technology impaired executive functioning", attention, cognition, learning, impulsivity and self-regulation. The lack of movement impedes learning and contributes to obesity. Using technology at bedtime, increases sleep deprivation which affects school performance. Exposure to physical and sexual violence through video games increases the child's own aggressive behaviours. The high speed of technology means children are less able to focus for long periods of time, they need this skill to learn in school. Being on the computer for more than 30 minutes also causes eye strain in children. Overuse of technology is linked to depression, anxiety and other mental health issues which are prevalent. Children can become attached to technology in the absence of parental attachment. As if all of this was not enough, the radiation emissions from cell phones are considered "probable carcinogens". For more about this, visit www.foodsandhealthylife.com.

I did some research to find out how playing on the iPad resulted in addiction. An article by David J. Linden on www.psychologytoday.com titled, Video Games Can Activate the Brain's Pleasure Circuits, proved my theory. David performed brain scans of men and women playing simple video games. He detected "rapid brain dopamine release". This was also measure with PET scans during an other study. He saw that "key regions of the medial forebrain pleasure centre circuit were also activated, including the nucleus accumbens as well as the amygdala, and the orbitofrontal cortex".

The cycle of addiction is well explained on www.helpguide.org, under the heading, Understanding Addiction. "Addiction hijacks the brain. This happens as the brain goes through a series of changes, beginning with recognition of pleasure and ending with a drive toward compulsive behaviour". The speed of the release of dopamine determines how addictive an experience will be. "The hippocampus creates a memory of this satisfaction and the amygdala creates a conditioned response to this stimuli".

I can certainly see how the immediate gratification and praise available through most computer games would lead to a release of dopamine. As I read this, I was reminded of the Eight Stages of Psychosocial Development, a theory developed by Erik Erikson. I am worried that children are not learning essential skills they can apply in the real world. Instead, they are becoming competent in the virtual world of computers. What will happen when they get older and realize these skills are not transferable? The first stage of Erikson's theory involves learning to trust that your parents will meet your needs. If your parents are busy and you are feeling neglected, you may become attached to technology. It is always there and rewarding. The next stage's challenge is to develop autonomy. Parents encourage their children to explore the world while keeping them safe. They become more confident, develop interests and become self-sufficient (in an age appropriate way). If the child is glued to a computer screen, this exploration is limited and the learning opportunities are lost. In the Initiative stage, children are learning to master their environment. They challenge themselves and feel successful when they reach their goals. Parents can assist with the parts that are a bit challenging. Children can go through an experience and feel proud of their accomplishment. If children are not interested in pursuing interests beyond computers, they gain a sense of mastery while playing that game as their skills develop. However, these skills don't matter when they are at school, needing to complete homework or collaborate in groups on assignments.

This post is my SOS to other parents who are in the same situation. I am not denying that learning computer skills can be helpful or suggesting that technology be banned. However, I am discovering the long term consequences of allowing my children to explore technology for extended periods of time. I will continue to monitor their use of technology and prepare alternative activities to enjoy with my daughters after school. I don't want to lose my girls: their creativity, their spontaneity, their presence to the overstimulating, numbing world of technology.

Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org

Wednesday, 27 January 2016

Ferguson Forest Education and Training Centre

January 27th 2016

Last Friday, I was reading the NG Times. There was an article about an Open House happening at the Ferguson Forest office this afternoon. I rarely go to community meetings because they are held in the evening and I am busy with my children at night. I was pleased to be able to attend this session. From what I could read, Ferguson Forest was preparing to apply for funding through the Ontario Trillium Foundation in order to expand the scope of its services to include more wheelchair access, a meditation area, a wildflower meadow and a bird sanctuary. I wanted to attend this event because the title: Ferguson Forest Education and Training Centre, stirred my imagination. It summoned images of children, hopefully my own, participating in activities that helped them appreciate, understand, respect and enjoy nature.

At the meeting, we were greeted by Carl Doucette, the Vice Chairman of the Board of Directors. On the wall, were plans for the arboretum. There were maybe 40-50 people in attendance, an impressive turnout. The goal of the meeting was to get ideas from members of the community regarding what they would like to see in the arboretum area of Ferguson Forest. The first step of any community development initiative is to find out what people want, otherwise a great deal of time and money are wasted as the public does not use the new space.

Carl explained that they are requesting funds under the "Activity" category therefore it will be a space devoted to various activities. They will choose the ideas that benefit the most people and encourage community members to explore their space. Throughout the meeting, there were ideas such as maintaining the toboggan hill, building a fenced-in dog park, creating a wheelchair-accessible labyrinth and an accessible path from Anniversary Park to Maple Grove, grooming multiple-use trails for snowshoers, pedestrians and skiers, selling Legacy Trees to line Veteran's Way and commemorative benches throughout the paths of the arboretum and, having a layout for Art in the Park where artists can teach and showcase their art.

The need for partnerships with community organizations and the necessity for the community to get involved were expressed. The group brought up the issue of communication. Ferguson Forest has many trails and beautiful spaces as well as programs that the public is not aware of. Carl says he would like to rectify this issue by using the local newspapers and radio station to promote their services and inform the community of changes to the arboretum as plans progress.

The group considered whether there should be washroom facilities on site then determined that it would not get approved due to washrooms being available in the office building, even though it's quite a distance away. Also, they have had issues in the past with washrooms being tipped over or vandalized. It doesn't help that the property runs along the Kemptville Creek, which is protected by the Rideau Valley Conservation Agency (RVCA) and, the Ministry of Natural Resources land. Therefore, there would be a great deal of red tape involved. Some people suggested the space should not only be educational and functional but also aesthetically pleasing. Others felt it was important to  hear birds and Maureen addressed the need to choose and plant trees that would attract birds.

The new space would have lots of signage, an important part of the educational component, in order to guide people from one area to the next. They also discussed opening the roads during all four seasons. At this time, the roads are closed during the winter. I explained that I attended this meeting as a parent, wanting to see more opportunities to include nature in the school's curriculum for my children's benefit. I asked if they had a partnership with any of the schools. Apparently, they have approached the schools, looking for ways they could fulfill their curriculum requirements within their arboretum. There has been no response from schools but Scouts do come and use the space and enjoy their educational events. Also, the Municipal Centre's summer camp participants use their services and visit their space throughout the summer. Ferguson Forest has a standing offer to schools who wish to participate in a guided tour of their trails. One member of the group suggested the lack of response from schools may be due to transportation costs and liability issues. They plan to offer training to teachers. This would provide them with the knowledge to take students through the trails for a guided tour.

Today, I learned about an area that has already been developed at the Ferguson Forest Centre, called Kinderwood. Children run through the path and learn about what they can find in the forest so they know what to look for. I must visit Kinderwood with my children on the weekend. John stressed the importance of making this wonderful land that we take for granted valuable, just like Central Park in New York City, because if we are not using the land and demonstrating our need for it, we may lose it in the long run.

Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org