Am I a Writer Yet?

December 1st, 2016

In the early 2000s, I submitted a short story to a collaborative book published by Mimi Publishing. I wrote about my work with people diagnosed with dementia. I wanted to inspire the staff in long term care and loved ones of individuals with dementia to stimulate and appreciate the person within the illness. When Mimi Publishing was ready to start its second collaboration, I submitted a more personal story. This time, my aim was to write about my childhood in a less than ideal low income neighbourhood in order to reach out to at-risk teens. The message to my story was that you can't choose your lifestyle when you are a child but, as an adult, you can design your own life regardless of your beginnings. The lady who edited my text, focused on the biographical aspect of my story and, by the time it went to print, there wasn't much left of the motivational part of my story. I was disappointed and never really sold that book to anyone.

Years later, I interviewed older adults living in my neighbourhood and submitted their stories to the local paper. I enjoyed doing this and ended up being a reporter for some time, visiting local businesses and interesting individuals to document what they were doing and why it mattered to the people in our community.

I enjoyed writing. I was able to use my creativity and people wrote to me or spoke to me when we bumped into one another to say they loved reading what I wrote. I approached a friend and artist Meredith Luce and we collaborated on a deck of art therapy cards. These cards were meant to help ease women going through painful life transitions by suggesting art therapy directives they could do from home with cheap materials.

I started volunteering in my daughter's class. I wanted to design workshops that taught life skills such as friendship, stress management, healthy boundaries, constructive self-expression and self-care but I couldn't find a book about the healthy expression of anger or frustration. This led me down the self-publishing path and my first book was born. Have You Hugged Your Alien? was my tool to initiate conversations with elementary school children about the normalcy of their emotions.

I followed up with a second book dealing with sibling rivalry as children adjust to a younger sibling. The first book was popular with teachers, therapists and parents. The second book was used by parents and the workshops were mostly in libraries or after school programs.

Last January, after chatting with my friend Chris who is a writer, I expressed my desire to write more often but my confusion about how one goes about getting paid for their work. Chris has been my informal mentor since then, pointing out grant application deadline, writer's festivals and events as well as associations that support and promote the work of writers. I have learned a great deal from her. I figured if I wanted to feel like a writer, I needed to write every day. So, I started this blog and I have written on most weekdays since then. I also write in my journal.

This past weekend, I attended the Small Press Fair in Ottawa. I was really scared but I got registered  and showed up anyways. Mandy from Classic Graphics had prepared a huge sign for me with a bio and a copy of the title page from each book as well as my logo on it. She did a great job, as usual. I found a table, under the gaze of the other writers who were already set up. I noticed they all had table cloths, really good quality ones. Oops! I scrambled back to my car and, luckily, I had a Dollar Store tablecloth in my truck, leftover from Wednesday's workshop. It would have to do. I finished setting up my table and acknowledged my neighbours, the ten sets of eyes sitting across from me. I felt like such a newbie. My sign was way too big. Everyone else was way more discreet. I felt like a nouveau riche surrounded by people who came from old money. "One of these things is not like the others". I stayed, I met interesting people, made excellent connections and now have one small press fair under my belt. It turns out that many of the people around my table were also new to this. Everyone was nice and supportive. I thoroughly enjoyed myself.

Now, I am writing a book for women, The Mommy Monologues. I am interviewing mothers from every walk of life. I have written a quarter of it already. I am humbled and moved by the tremendous stories of love and courage that these mothers are sharing with me. I used to be an art therapist who also liked to write. As time goes on, more people introduce me as a writer who is also an art therapist.  I was thinking about this on the weekend. I felt like an imposter. I didn't study English literature, I'm never sure if my grammar and punctuation are acceptable, English isn't even my first language. I love to write and do it every day but I still feel like a liar when I say I'm a writer. I wondered what makes someone a writer. There are plenty of successful authors who did not have a background in English Literature. There is an equally impressive amount of people with an English degree who have yet to write anything. So, this leads me to my question: Am I a writer yet?

I feel like an art therapist who loves to write and does so to help people connect and heal. I proudly call myself an author because I have self-published books however, I still feel like a fraud if I call myself a writer. Perhaps this next book will be a game-changer for me. Who knows? For now, I am just enjoying the writing process, the therapeutic value in people telling their stories to someone who is hanging on their every word, the sense of hope and connection that women get from recognizing their story in someone else's narrative and, the pride I get for bringing these amazing women together in one book.

Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org

Painting from the Source

February 21st, 2016

There is an approach to painting which, in my opinion, represents the very core of art therapy, it's called Painting from the Source. There is a book about this relationship to art with that exact title. The author's name is Aviva Gold and she facilitates Painting from the Source workshops. I know so many women who envy people who are creative. They wish they could draw or paint. Artists are mysterious to them and lucky.

Painting from the Source means you recognize your connection to wisdom and you enter into a dialogue with art materials to create openly, spontaneously. You prepare the environment, you show up and you trust in the process. The goal of the art in this approach, as in art therapy, is to create something, not for others, to show off, sell or display but because it feels good, it helps you connect to your wisdom and it provides insight.

When you approach art in this way, not planning, just allowing, your creation presents images to you. You play around with colours and textures and notice what emerges. Often, as an image takes shape in your doodle or paint, you have an emotional connection to it, a recognition of the message it brings. As you paint, you become acquainted with, and welcome, this form of communication. You need to pick a time when you are free to create without interruptions and commit to it. It helps to set up a private space so you can create freely without the fear that someone will see your work before you are ready to share it.

If you have a hard time getting started, paint the anxiety you feel about doing this. Choose your favourite colour and paint a geometric shape on the paper with that colour. Start by doodling or graffiti. Blindfold yourself or imagine that you are someone or something else (e.g. an animal). The author suggests: "paint faster and pretend you're going to burn the painting anyway". For clients who are afraid of making a mess, I suggest they make the biggest, ugliest mess they can imagine. This generally results in a wide grin on their face and some vivid, colourful work. If your mind kicks in and starts criticizing your efforts, focus on the pleasant sensations of the experience. "Pretend you're four years old again...that you've never seen paint or brushes before.."

When you paint in this way, you relinquish control. You become your wisdom's tool to bring about colour and images to the blank paper. You are at the service of your art. You must go with your gut when you are selecting a paint brush, choosing a paint colour, deciding which parts of the painting to paint over, which images to develop and which areas of your paper you should explore. Once you have a painting, you can go deeper by asking yourself what the people in your painting would say if they had a voice or even ask your painting what it wants and doing the first thing that comes to your mind. You can "scan for images that may be hidden in abstract shapes" or "look for a space where you sense something is hidden that wants to emerge".

Aviva recommends these strategies if you feel stuck:

Paint yourself stuck in the birth canal
Silence your critic by painting whatever he or she would hate the most
Paint your pain
Paint your emotions
Paint feces, genitals or vomit

I can attest to the beauty of this experience and encourage all of you to try it.

Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org

Creative Journaling

January 3rd, 2016

Writing is so therapeutic. You don't need to be an artist to get creative. I write in my journal every day, it is my preferred method of self-care. I get my journals from The Dollar Store, cheap as chips. Every day, I start with the date and time then write whatever comes to mind. I add a list of ten things I am grateful for and why before I close my journal and start my day. Don't know how to get started? Here are some tips:

1-Get a cheap journal from the dollare store and, if you can afford it, buy yourself a special pen.
2-Find your best time of the day. Some of us get up and our minds are buzzing with creative ideas. For others, the best time is at night once everyone else is in bed. Go with your preference.
3-Pick a spot. Is there a cozy chair, a private walk-in closet or a particularly sunny room where you can sit and write undisturbed?
4- Set up a ritual. Just like remembering to take your meds (if you do, in fact, take meds), it is easier to stay with your writing if you have a specific ritual. I read while I'm on my treadmill, I pick out my clothing, grab my journal and head for the shower room. I lock the door and sit on a shaggy carpet next to the tub we never use. That is where I journal. I get in the shower and the ideas play around in my head, leading to insight, as I wash.
5-Don't worry about content, length, quality, grammar. This is for your eyes only. Just start and see where it takes you.
6-If you are struggling with what to write about, draw a circle, divide it into sections like slices of a pie. List the different categories of your life, one topic per slice. Examples might be health, family, career, friends, personal growth, spirituality etc... Write a goal for each section. What would be your  ideal for that category? Then, each day, you can write about one of the categories, describing what you or your life would be like if you achieved your goal and what steps you can take to get there.


You can also write about your feelings. If you are happy, writing can help you savor this moment and return to read about it when life gets more challenging. If you are sad, expressing how you feel and why can help you gain insight into other factors that are contributing to your mood that may have otherwise gone unnoticed. If you are angry, venting can help you calm down and formulate your thoughts in order to communicate more effectively with loved ones.

Gratitude is another trendy topic. I recently saw a post on Facebook where someone created a mandala by writing everything s/he was grateful for in a circular fashion, like a spiral. It was uplifting and beautiful.

If you have observed a disturbing pattern in your behavior, create a comic strip in your journal. Trace out eight squares. Think about the pattern in a step by step fashion. What is happening before the pattern is triggered? How do you behave when you are triggered? What are the consequences of this behavior? How do you respond to these consequences? You can draw or describe each step in the squares. Once the pattern is visually displayed, think about what would happen if you moved the steps around or if you reacted in an opposite way or removed a step altogether. This exercise sounds simple but it can be enlightening.

If you are more visual, you can create a visual journal. Draw in your journal, create a collage with words or images cut out of magazines or newspapers. I recommend glue sticks rather than white glue because a glue stick won't make the pages wet, sticky and lumpy and, it dries faster. You can also incorporate pieces of fabric in your art. One technique I learned at an art therapy conference uses colorful, patterned napkins. Let's say there is a scene of a table in a beautiful garden. You cut out the image you like and place it in your journal. You then brush some diluted white glue over the image to fasten it to the page. You will need to keep your journal open until it's dry but you can create some really impressive scenes this way.

I hope this post has inspired you to try journaling. Happy writing!

Anne