September 9th, 2016
For years, this was a busy time of the year for me, not just because my own children were starting school but because I was a College professor and I was also launching a semester with a brand new group of students. I loved teaching the psychology and leadership classes. I endeavoured to create opportunities for these young adults to formulate their opinions and defend them when others opposed them. There was a mix of students from rural communities, foreign students, some from rich backgrounds, others from poor neighbourhoods. What a fabulous opportunity to open their eyes to diversity.
I now offer stress management workshops in high schools and youth centres. We talk about the pressures of social media to NOT do something stupid because these days, your mistakes are well documented and still on the internet years later. When someone texts you, you feel that you must respond immediately. There is no room for contemplation or delayed reaction. You can't be too busy to bother with your text, Facebook or Messenger. Your iPhone is on you at all times so it is assumed that you know the instant that someone has pinged you and if you don't reply, you must be ignoring that person. Many conflicts stem from unrealistic expectations and miscommunications. I hear so much about the multiple pressures affecting today's teens. They have access to too much information, they have too many choices, they have no time as the responsibilities of school, family, friends and work are compounded. There is no down time. They are always on and accessible even if they don't want to be.
One of the common mistakes according to grade 11 students is the pressure to pick a career. They are expected to orchestrate electives and field placements in grade 12 to reflect their future vocation. Many of them have no clue what they want to do after high school. They are not sure who they are, what they like and, what is available. We all know about careers like becoming a doctor, lawyer, veterinarian, teacher, astronaut, police officer etc but this is not an exclusive list. There are so many options that you don't hear about until you are out of school, living your life. I think a huge responsibility we have as parents is to be open and receptive to our children's talents and interests so we can empower them to gain experience in activities they enjoy. This provides a sense of identity, mastery and belonging to our children. It also exposes them to a potential area of employment for the future. Once you find a few activities you truly enjoy, this leads you to other related activities. You decide what you did or didn't like about a certain activity and sometimes you discover something similar that you like even more. This incremental approach is a much smoother and less stressful process than simply demanding that students choose among the limited options they are aware of at that moment.
When I worked as a College professor, I desperately wanted to change our curriculum so that students spent a minimum amount of time in class taking notes. My vision was to do a thorough intake interview with students to uncover their goals, aspirations, strengths, interests etc. Then contact partners of our program to organize a field placement for the entire semester. Each placement site would be chosen specifically to suit the career goals of our students. We would have course notes online every week. The students would be tested on site to ensure they had mastered these skills. Having to put new skills into practise would demonstrate their ability to function in a real work environment. There are plenty of students who can describe the procedural steps required to complete a task but when they are at their placement site, they are not able to demonstrate this skill. Feedback from placement supervisors would help students improve and gain awareness regarding their particular strengths and areas of improvement. Right now, we force everyone to take the same courses and that results in low retention. The good workers are hired by placement sites, affecting their attendance and overall success in the program. Learning online and through carefully selected placements is the way of the future.
If you are a student, feeling the pressure, confused about where to go, what to do and how to get there, here is my advice to you:
This is your life. Forget the opinions and expectations of others. If you try to do what someone else wants, chances are you won't succeed and they will be disappointed in you. Figure out who you are with these questions:
Do you like being outdoors or indoors?
Do you enjoy having a routine and repeating tasks every day?
Are you a social person who likes to be around people or do you prefer animals, paperwork, art, computers?
Are you good at working with your hands?
Do you thrive in a high stress environment?
Are you adventurous?
Do you like to travel? If so, what kinds of destinations are of interest to you?
Do you have a special talent, something that comes easily to you?
Are you a loner or do you find meaning in working with a team?
What is your ideal dress code, (at home in your pjs, in your swim suit on a beach, in snow pants on a ski slope, jeans and a t-shirt or business suit)?
What kind of people do you enjoy spending time with on a daily basis (snooty, party animals, humanitarians), intellectuals, down-to-earth people?
Do you want to make a difference or just enjoy yourself?
Are you compassionate and intuitive?
Are you creative?
Do you prefer leading or following?
Are you organized and methodical?
Do you know someone who already has your ideal job? Can you contact this person to find out how they got the job and what steps you need to take to get there?
What is more important to you, money or meaning?
Is there a cause that is important to you (environment, addiction, mental health, child development, at-risk youth. advocacy for older adults)?
The more you get to know yourself, the easier it will be for you to find opportunities that match your skill-set. Get involved in your community, take classes, volunteer, join groups, read the local paper. These help you meet people who may lead to opportunities, insights or referrals in the future. By volunteering, you learn skills, you gain experience on the workforce, confidence in yourself and you develop a work ethic. This gives you an advantage over other people your age.
It's ok to not know what you want to do. As long as you are out there gaining experience you will start to discover what you like. If you are a good worker, there will be opportunities coming your way. Take advantage of them because they propel you forwards and result in an impressive resume. At some point down the line, you will find your niche. You will feel satisfied and become quite competent. This may be your life long career or you may eventually change directions and end up somewhere else. It doesn't matter. If you wait to know exactly what you want, you may never get started and you could be pursuing a path that turns out to be a disappointment. Follow your passion, work hard and don't be afraid to take risks. There will always be people to tell you what you should or can't do. They are expressing their opinions. Look at their life, are they fulfilled and happy? If not, it's best to just go with your gut and keep moving. Good luck to you!
Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org
Showing posts with label advice. Show all posts
Showing posts with label advice. Show all posts
Friday, 9 September 2016
Tuesday, 28 June 2016
Book 0f the Week-TED Talks: The Official TED Guide to Public Speaking
June 28th, 2016
I came across the new book put out by Chris Anderson a few weeks ago at the Kemptville Public Library. I was intrigued. The book provides great tips for people who'd like to try public speaking. The more I learned from this book, the more I could see how these same tips could be applied to writing a book as well.
The most challenging part of any speech is choosing a topic. You need to have a clear focus for your speech, something that an audience will find interesting. Chris encourages you to think about what makes you unique, that only you could share.
Once you have your intention, you need to find a structure to present this idea to the world. This depends on who you are speaking to and for how long. Chris describes a speech as a journey so you take the audience through steps from presenting your idea to how it applies to their lives, showing them why it matters to them.
Since TED talks last 18 minutes, the presenter must hook the audience, keep them curious and share information that teaches them something they didn't know-gifting them with new insight.
The book shares great tools on how to deliver a successful speech. It shows you how to connect to the audience so they see a human being speaking to them, someone who is fully present and engaged. Then we are taught about the power of storytelling to bring the audience into our world. Next comes the importance of explaining our idea in clear language-taking baby steps as we open their minds to new concepts. Chris also reveals tricks to persuade an audience to see things differently without coercion. He explains that we can engage them to come to the same conclusion as us through their very own "detective" work.
There is a great deal of practical advice throughout this book, from what to wear, whether to stand or sit and, the decision to use of visuals and technology or leave them out. An entire chapter is devoted to whether you should write out and memorize your speech or speak without notes. I find that it's best for me if I talk out loud about my idea first. Then I write the main concepts on a post-it and I try to create my speech around those points. Once I have a good flow from one concept to the next, I can rehearse it anywhere without my notes: in the shower, while I drive, as I cook supper etc. It becomes natural. If I have notes written down, I keep looking at my notes, I can never figure out where I am in the page and I tend to lose the intonation in my voice, not good.
If you are nervous about public speaking, as many people are, there is advice on ways to conquer your nerves and deliver a winning speech. The book teaches you how to start your speech, how to end it and ways to be innovative. The last chapter is philosophical. It urges us to share our story because we learn from one another and become better collectively as a result. If you plan to try public speaking, this book is an absolute gem. I have started writing out an 18 minute speech on the importance of prosocial education in our public education system. You never know. If you had 18 minutes to deliver a meaningful speech to impact a large audience what would it be?
Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org
I came across the new book put out by Chris Anderson a few weeks ago at the Kemptville Public Library. I was intrigued. The book provides great tips for people who'd like to try public speaking. The more I learned from this book, the more I could see how these same tips could be applied to writing a book as well.
The most challenging part of any speech is choosing a topic. You need to have a clear focus for your speech, something that an audience will find interesting. Chris encourages you to think about what makes you unique, that only you could share.
Once you have your intention, you need to find a structure to present this idea to the world. This depends on who you are speaking to and for how long. Chris describes a speech as a journey so you take the audience through steps from presenting your idea to how it applies to their lives, showing them why it matters to them.
Since TED talks last 18 minutes, the presenter must hook the audience, keep them curious and share information that teaches them something they didn't know-gifting them with new insight.
The book shares great tools on how to deliver a successful speech. It shows you how to connect to the audience so they see a human being speaking to them, someone who is fully present and engaged. Then we are taught about the power of storytelling to bring the audience into our world. Next comes the importance of explaining our idea in clear language-taking baby steps as we open their minds to new concepts. Chris also reveals tricks to persuade an audience to see things differently without coercion. He explains that we can engage them to come to the same conclusion as us through their very own "detective" work.
There is a great deal of practical advice throughout this book, from what to wear, whether to stand or sit and, the decision to use of visuals and technology or leave them out. An entire chapter is devoted to whether you should write out and memorize your speech or speak without notes. I find that it's best for me if I talk out loud about my idea first. Then I write the main concepts on a post-it and I try to create my speech around those points. Once I have a good flow from one concept to the next, I can rehearse it anywhere without my notes: in the shower, while I drive, as I cook supper etc. It becomes natural. If I have notes written down, I keep looking at my notes, I can never figure out where I am in the page and I tend to lose the intonation in my voice, not good.
If you are nervous about public speaking, as many people are, there is advice on ways to conquer your nerves and deliver a winning speech. The book teaches you how to start your speech, how to end it and ways to be innovative. The last chapter is philosophical. It urges us to share our story because we learn from one another and become better collectively as a result. If you plan to try public speaking, this book is an absolute gem. I have started writing out an 18 minute speech on the importance of prosocial education in our public education system. You never know. If you had 18 minutes to deliver a meaningful speech to impact a large audience what would it be?
Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org
Thursday, 16 June 2016
Older and Wiser Women
June 16th, 2016
Today, I went into TLC to look into the price of renting a chair to sit in the shower, a transport wheelchair, a hand-held shower head and many other implements. We are preparing for a visit from my mother-in-law, a vibrant, fun-loving woman who has some health concerns and mobility issues. We want her to be as comfortable as possible during her stay with us.
Stepping into this shop brought me back to my days working in long term care. I was surrounded by geriatric chairs, walkers and quad canes. As I drove away, I started to reminisce about the women I encountered through my work. I spent some time managing a locked unit but before then, I was working as a mobile art therapist travelling from one unit to the next.
I learned so much from the ladies I met at that time. I noticed that their approach to life now reflected the approach they had always had to life. I also got to hear their stories and learn from their successes and mistakes. One lady told me about her husband who neglected her and stressed her out. When this lovely woman had a stroke, that same husband never came to visit her.
I saw so many women who had five children but never had any visitors. Initially, I assumed they must have been an abusive mother or, have somehow alienated their adult children. However, it is so common that I think they can't all be abusive alcoholic moms. There is something else going on here. When I ask about their children, they tell me that they live out of town or have crazy jobs and very little time to visit. It's very sad because someday she won't be there anymore and they'll want to hear her voice or see her face. It'll be too late.
I have made decisions based on what they have shared with me. Here are some things they have taught me:
1-Don't let a man treat you like dirt
2-Communication is key to a successful marriage
3-Do what you love
4-Don't care what others think or say about you
5-Friends are important, make time for them
6-Enjoy your children when they are young, it feels long but it will actually fly by and you'll miss it later
7-Say yes to life, don't sit on the sidelines because you're scared of being judged or because of your weight
8-Spend your money on experiences not on a new shirt, you'll forget about clothing but you'll remember the experience and so will everyone who was with you
9-Be yourself
10-Your health is your most important asset, don't take it for granted
So there you have it, now you know what older, wiser women wish they knew when they were younger. If you follow their advice, you too can get to a ripe old age and pass your wisdom on to the next generation.
Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org
Today, I went into TLC to look into the price of renting a chair to sit in the shower, a transport wheelchair, a hand-held shower head and many other implements. We are preparing for a visit from my mother-in-law, a vibrant, fun-loving woman who has some health concerns and mobility issues. We want her to be as comfortable as possible during her stay with us.
Stepping into this shop brought me back to my days working in long term care. I was surrounded by geriatric chairs, walkers and quad canes. As I drove away, I started to reminisce about the women I encountered through my work. I spent some time managing a locked unit but before then, I was working as a mobile art therapist travelling from one unit to the next.
I learned so much from the ladies I met at that time. I noticed that their approach to life now reflected the approach they had always had to life. I also got to hear their stories and learn from their successes and mistakes. One lady told me about her husband who neglected her and stressed her out. When this lovely woman had a stroke, that same husband never came to visit her.
I saw so many women who had five children but never had any visitors. Initially, I assumed they must have been an abusive mother or, have somehow alienated their adult children. However, it is so common that I think they can't all be abusive alcoholic moms. There is something else going on here. When I ask about their children, they tell me that they live out of town or have crazy jobs and very little time to visit. It's very sad because someday she won't be there anymore and they'll want to hear her voice or see her face. It'll be too late.
I have made decisions based on what they have shared with me. Here are some things they have taught me:
1-Don't let a man treat you like dirt
2-Communication is key to a successful marriage
3-Do what you love
4-Don't care what others think or say about you
5-Friends are important, make time for them
6-Enjoy your children when they are young, it feels long but it will actually fly by and you'll miss it later
7-Say yes to life, don't sit on the sidelines because you're scared of being judged or because of your weight
8-Spend your money on experiences not on a new shirt, you'll forget about clothing but you'll remember the experience and so will everyone who was with you
9-Be yourself
10-Your health is your most important asset, don't take it for granted
So there you have it, now you know what older, wiser women wish they knew when they were younger. If you follow their advice, you too can get to a ripe old age and pass your wisdom on to the next generation.
Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org
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