Marketing-A Way of Life

September 15th, 2016

I have been on fire ever since I attended the Black Card Books Bootcamp this past weekend. The way I see everything has changed. I am a very passionate person. As an art therapist, I get clients active, focused on the issue at-hand and how it is impacting their current life. My goal is not to draw out the process but to build a bridge between their life as-is and the life they are hoping to create. We explore the perceived obstacles and, through storytelling and art-making, we begin moving in the right direction. People leave with tangible tools and a plan. I am happy about that. Is that a smart way to run a business? Some would say no. However, I see it as positive because if people can get "un-stuck" in one session, they will feel great, get results and tell others about my services. I also feel drawn to clients who, traditionally, don't have a whole lot of money: teenagers, single moms, women in the process of getting a divorce, men who have stopped working due to ptsd etc. This leads to a need for sliding scale fees and, in some cases, I choose to offer my work for free.

At this bootcamp, I realized that my approach is not effective from a business standpoint. So far, I've tried to get into schools to showcase my workshops. The teachers and students love my workshops but they can't afford to pay me. The people who are in a position to fund my services do not see the children's smiling faces, they don't feel the excitement and energy in the room, they don't witness my connection with the children, they don't feel the relief of teachers as they hold tools in their hands that can help them manage negative class behaviours and promote cooperation in the classroom. So, now I am thinking: stop selling your services to the people who desperately want them but have no resources. Start educating the people with the purse strings by teaching them how they can benefit from your services.

As I walked around running errands this morning, I noticed every t-shirt or shopping bag with a logo on it. I took in the signs and slogans plastered on trucks, billboards and shop windows. I analyzed McDonald's golden arches and Timmie's brown coffee cups. I reflected on my purchases over the past weeks-Smile cookies for the Kemptville Youth Centre, an added two dollars at the grocery store to support Neon Night and raise funds for families whose children are dealing with a cancer diagnosis.

We breathe and eat marketing through the logos on our clothing, our choices of shopping venue, our patronage, the many commercials we watch on television or jingles we hear over the radio. People are constantly trying to sell you something. More and more, we are our business card. People get to know you, not as a client but as a person. They find out what you do. They like and trust you and recommend you to a friend.

I remember working in long term care as a program manager. My mother also worked at this facility  as an administrative assistant. I heard about some professionals who had behaved rudely toward my mother because she was just "the secretary". This changed they way I saw them and my inclination to do business with them. Treating everyone with respect gets you noticed. Embodying the values you promote in your business is one of the best marketing tools. I once paid for a yoga instructor to come and teach at my husband's spa. She showed up late, stressed, holding a cup of coffee and smelling like cigarettes. If we are hiring her to help us lead a healthier and calmer life, then her behaviour is a deterrent.

The bootcamp has me thinking differently. Other businesses want to serve my target population. I can work with them to provide services in a seamless manner. A client recently told me how difficult it can be for families who are adopting a second child to adequately prepare their eldest for this transition. They get a call and, within 24 hours, they have a child. I had never thought about this. I have this great book about a dog who feel jealous when a kitten gets adopted. I have been selling the book through clients and in local stores. I now see how providing copies to adoption agencies can boost the amount of families who are exposed to my book and ease this transition for so many families.

I also see how the Humane Society who is very conscientious of preparing adoptive families to take on a new pet might want to use this book for fundraisers. If I rely simply on selling directly to families, I miss so many families who could benefit from this book. By catering to organizations who serve my target population, I can reach more families and really make a difference in their lives. I am so excited by this revelation. I have a French book for children due out by the end of September. I now have a plan to pair up with a new French school in Kemptville in order to distribute the book to as many French families in the area as possible.

Whatever business you are in, I urge you to think about your target population. Where are they? What do they need? How can you communicate to them that you can help? What other businesses serve this population? How can you collaborate with these businesses to reach your clients? Marketing has become more than trying to sell my services to potential clients. It has become a way of sending a message to future clients that I understand what they are going through and I can help.

Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org

My Speech for Teens

September 9th, 2016

For years, this was a busy time of the year for me, not just because my own children were starting school but because I was a College professor and I was also launching a semester with a brand new group of students. I loved teaching the psychology and leadership classes. I endeavoured to create opportunities for these young adults to formulate their opinions and defend them when others opposed them. There was a mix of students from rural communities, foreign students, some from rich backgrounds, others from poor neighbourhoods. What a fabulous opportunity to open their eyes to diversity.

I now offer stress management workshops in high schools and youth centres. We talk about the pressures of social media to NOT do something stupid because these days, your mistakes are well documented and still on the internet years later. When someone texts you, you feel that you must respond immediately. There is no room for contemplation or delayed reaction. You can't be too busy to bother with your text, Facebook or Messenger. Your iPhone is on you at all times so it is assumed that you know the instant that someone has pinged you and if you don't reply, you must be ignoring that person. Many conflicts stem from unrealistic expectations and miscommunications. I hear so much about the multiple pressures affecting today's teens. They have access to too much information, they have too many choices, they have no time as the responsibilities of school, family, friends and work are compounded. There is no down time. They are always on and accessible even if they don't want to be.

One of the common mistakes according to grade 11 students is the pressure to pick a career. They are expected to orchestrate electives and field placements in grade 12 to reflect their future vocation. Many of them have no clue what they want to do after high school. They are not sure who they are, what they like and, what is available. We all know about careers like becoming a doctor, lawyer, veterinarian, teacher, astronaut, police officer etc but this is not an exclusive list. There are so many options that you don't hear about until you are out of school, living your life. I think a huge responsibility we have as parents is to be open and receptive to our children's talents and interests so we can empower them to gain experience in activities they enjoy. This provides a sense of identity, mastery and belonging to our children. It also exposes them to a potential area of employment for the future. Once you find a few activities you truly enjoy, this leads you to other related activities. You decide what you did or didn't like about a certain activity and sometimes you discover something similar that you like even more. This incremental approach is a much smoother and less stressful process than simply demanding that students choose among the limited options they are aware of at that moment.

When I worked as a College professor, I desperately wanted to change our curriculum so that students spent a minimum amount of time in class taking notes. My vision was to do a thorough intake interview with students to uncover their goals, aspirations, strengths, interests etc. Then contact partners of our program to organize a field placement for the entire semester. Each placement site would be chosen specifically to suit the career goals of our students. We would have course notes online every week. The students would be tested on site to ensure they had mastered these skills. Having to put new skills into practise would demonstrate their ability to function in a real work environment. There are plenty of students who can describe the procedural steps required to complete a task but when they are at their placement site, they are not able to demonstrate this skill. Feedback from placement supervisors would help students improve and gain awareness regarding their particular strengths and areas of improvement. Right now, we force everyone to take the same courses and that results in low retention. The good workers are hired by placement sites, affecting their attendance and overall success in the program. Learning online and through carefully selected placements is the way of the future.

If you are a student, feeling the pressure, confused about where to go, what to do and how to get there, here is my advice to you:

This is your life. Forget the opinions and expectations of others. If you try to do what someone else wants, chances are you won't succeed and they will be disappointed in you. Figure out who you are with these questions:

Do you like being outdoors or indoors?
Do you enjoy having a routine and repeating tasks every day?
Are you a social person who likes to be around people or do you prefer animals, paperwork, art, computers?
Are you good at working with your hands?
Do you thrive in a high stress environment?
Are you adventurous?
Do you like to travel? If so, what kinds of destinations are of interest to you?
Do you have a special talent, something that comes easily to you?
Are you a loner or do you find meaning in working with a team?
What is your ideal dress code, (at home in your pjs, in your swim suit on a beach, in snow pants on a ski slope, jeans and a t-shirt or business suit)?
What kind of people do you enjoy spending time with on a daily basis (snooty, party animals, humanitarians), intellectuals, down-to-earth people?
Do you want to make a difference or just enjoy yourself?
Are you compassionate and intuitive?
Are you creative?
Do you prefer leading or following?
Are you organized and methodical?
Do you know someone who already has your ideal job? Can you contact this person to find out how they got the job and what steps you need to take to get there?
What is more important to you, money or meaning?
Is there a cause that is important to you (environment, addiction, mental health, child development, at-risk youth. advocacy for older adults)?

The more you get to know yourself, the easier it will be for you to find opportunities that match your skill-set. Get involved in your community, take classes, volunteer, join groups, read the local paper. These help you meet people who may lead to opportunities, insights or referrals in the future. By volunteering, you learn skills, you gain experience on the workforce, confidence in yourself and you develop a work ethic. This gives you an advantage over other people your age.

It's ok to not know what you want to do. As long as you are out there gaining experience you will start to discover what you like. If you are a good worker, there will be opportunities coming your way. Take advantage of them because they propel you forwards and result in an impressive resume. At some point down the line, you will find your niche. You will feel satisfied and become quite competent. This may be your life long career or you may eventually change directions and end up somewhere else. It doesn't matter. If you wait to know exactly what you want, you may never get started and you could be pursuing a path that turns out to be a disappointment. Follow your passion, work hard and don't be afraid to take risks. There will always be people to tell you what you should or can't do. They are expressing their opinions. Look at their life, are they fulfilled and happy? If not, it's best to just go with your gut and keep moving. Good luck to you!

Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org

Date Night

January 31st

Just over ten years ago, Vincent and I became parents. Our youngest daughter's Godparents, the Braidecs, were at my husband's shop. They were celebrating their wedding anniversary. I can't remember which anniversary it was but they have been together a long time, with two happy, successful, adult children. I asked them for the secret to a long marriage. I was expecting something like communication, compassion, humour etc, the usuals. They said they always made a point of having a date, once a week. This can be challenging when the children are young but it's important.

To this day, Vincent and I have our date night every week. I truly do believe it has helped us stay connected through the tough times. When you have children, you form a triangle and, although you can all interact as a family, the focus of both parents is usually directed to the child. When you try to communicate as a couple, within the home, you can be interrupted so many times you never finish any of the topics. This can lead to frustration, miscommunication and alienation.

Also, because it's easy to get sucked into a routine where each partner has a role, unless a couple gets out of the house without children on a regular basis, when they finally end up alone together, they may no longer know how to connect. They suddenly feel like strangers and have nothing to say. Our dates allowed us to stay romantic. I would dress up every week. The girls loved watching me get changed out of my "mommy" clothes. They always suggested which dress to wear. It shows them what it's like to care for someone and want special time with them. They saw us as a united couple who went out and had fun together.

During our date nights, we could have fun, laugh about whatever had happened during the week or just enjoy each other's company the way we did before we became parents. Sometimes, when we were stressed and overwhelmed by our responsibilities, we might take each other for granted and communicate in gruff ways throughout the week. It was nice to go out and realize we were ok. Taken away from the context of "duties", our pace would resume and we could see beyond the stress of the week.

On a few occasions, we vented our frustrations in the car on the way to the restaurant. We could get everything out without worrying that the children could hear. We might stay in the car longer than anticipated but, in the end, we had cleared the air and we were able to progress. Going out regularly means you don't forget what it's like to enjoy being your spouse's partner. We have had amazing conversations in the car and at the restaurant. We are able to talk about what is happening in our life, what we have learned, what our goals are for the future etc.

Even though there were weeks that the girls begged me to stay home with them when they were younger, they now look forward to our date night because they love their babysitter, Lauren. When they were very young, our date may be the only outing I got all week. It felt good to dress up and enjoy my supper while it was still warm, to feel like a woman. We became regulars in some restaurants and developed friendships with wait staff, managers and restaurant owners. It was fun to get out, socialize and have a good laugh.

Our sense of humour has always been a big part of our relationship. Spending time together, relaxing, eating good food, chatting, joking around, holding hands, even kissing on the way to the car, all of it has helped to keep our relationship fresh and fun.

If you have young children and you need to bring some joy back in your life, follow these steps:

1-Make date night a priority.
2-Find reliable, responsible people to babysit. If you have no money to pay for a sitter, see if a friend with children will trade with you so they can go out as well. You could also eat at home after you put the kids to bed so you can talk and have a date alone.
3-You don't need to go somewhere fancy. Tim Hortons and Subway can work just as well as a fancy restaurant. The point is to have time together.
4-Don't use this time to complain, go over the honey-do list or stress out about bills. All of this can be done during the drive there if you absolutely need to discuss it. Once you get to the restaurant, switch to date mode.
5-Dress up for your date so you can feel sexy. Don't forget to notice how good your partner looks.
6-Take the opportunity to hold hands, sit close together and cuddle.
7-Don't invite others to join you unless you have other opportunities to go out together alone.

Enjoy!

Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org