November 30th, 2016
I don't recall reading The Secret when it first came out. I saw a video and heard people talking about it. I did read The Magic which teaches us to be grateful as a way to elevate our frequency in order to manifest our goals. I did The Magic's 28 day challenge and I was amazed at how my life changed. I would get up every day and write ten things I was grateful for in my journal. The key was to not only write what I was thankful for but why. The why helps you feel the emotion behind your gratitude. So, writing that I am happy to be healthy becomes more concrete when I write that my health allows me to be present for my children, take care of them and watch them grow up. I also got into the habit of writing Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! after each gratitude. There was a different energy to my life during those 28 days. I had just released my Have You Hugged Your Alien? book, it was self-published and I only ordered a small quantity because I was basically printing copies for myself, to use during workshops and sell to teachers. The book exploded, I sold out, parents, teachers and therapists were ordering it and my workshops took off. I was invited to speak on radio and tv shows and I was totally unprepared.
I got very busy and, even though I always end the day giving thanks for whatever happened that day, I fell out of the habit of weaving gratitude into my every day life. How The Secret Changed My Life by Rhonda Byrne, caught my attention. The cover had the trademark wax seal with the letter S stamped in the middle. I immediately recognized it and purchased the book. As I read stories of people who had stories similar to the one I had a few years ago, I felt my own energy start to fine tune itself. I was feeling that electric surge again. Things in my life were getting easier. I coupled the journalling about what I am grateful for with my vision for 2017.
This past fall, I attended a publishing bootcamp and was taught to write my "heart's desire" list every day. I repeat many of the same items every day. There is usually a new item or something gets re-worded but it's generally the same idea. You write your list in the present tense as if it has already happened. You focus only on what you want to attract into your life. The list should be as specific as possible.
The Secret taught me to really experience the items on my list, thinking about how it would feel, smell, look and sound to manifest this. So I create vision boards, write affirmations and design visualizations of my life in 2017. How The Secret Changed My Life came into my life at the best time. I am working on my new book, The Mommy Monologues. I need to feel confident that people will come forward to share their stories and that my book will get published. I have no idea how people will hear about my book or how it will make it to the bestseller's list but I don't have to worry about the "how". For now, I picture the book in my hands by Mother's Day 2017. I see it as a bestseller. I imagine myself donating funds to two charities that are on my mind and in line with the message in the book.
Practicing gratitude, having a plan and anticipating how great it will feel to reach my goals is not difficult and doesn't require that much energy. I can, however, attest to the shift that happens when I apply these practices. I feel happier, my relationships are more positive and, through synchronicity, I seem to meet the right people at the right time. Works for me!
Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org
Showing posts with label success. Show all posts
Showing posts with label success. Show all posts
Wednesday, 30 November 2016
Friday, 18 November 2016
What Should We Teach Our Children?
November 18th, 2016
A few days ago, I saw a post on Facebook that truly inspired me. I have these fantasies about homeschooling my girls and traveling as a family. I love their school. They have awesome teachers. I have no problems with their experience at school. If they are going to attend school, KPS is my number one choice. However, both my girls beg me to stay home on a weekly, sometimes daily basis. Why? They are both introverts. They hate crowds and loud noises. They feel drained by the end of the day, not from the physical exertion but the strain of togetherness when what they really want is some quite time to draw, read, think and be.
Here is the quote that got me thinking:
"What if... instead of worrying about whether we should give kids gold stars for participating or gold stars for being the best, we involve kids in real world activities where the end result of the activity itself is the reward? Teach them gardening, woodworking, repair skills, fibre arts, sewing, cooking, get them out hiking somewhere with a gorgeous view. Raise animals and have them learn to care about something other than themselves. Have them help out a grandparent or elderly neighbour. Our society has lost sight of what's truly important in life. It's time to find it again". (Grow Food, Not Lawns).
I am convinced that our children would benefit from applying the knowledge they need to retain rather than trying to master information long enough to pass a test. What they learn in school is so abstract. When are they going to use long division? If they spend time in nature, learning about trees, plants, insects and animals, they will naturally feel more grounded and be inclined to protect the environment because they have a relationship with nature, they'll want to preserve it.
I have witnessed the detrimental effect of the school's health curriculum on preteens. We are so focused on avoiding child obesity that we are creating a generation of young girls who count calories and compare the size of their thighs, worrying that they will become obese. Why not teach them how to grow healthy food and eat fruits and veggies? There are no labels and packaging when you shop in your garden or greenhouse. How empowering would it be for children to learn how to prepare tasty, healthy food?
Math can be applied to every day situations from having a budget and shopping for food together, clipping coupons, comparing prices to find the best deal, paying bills, donating to charity and saving up for something special. Cooking and geometry go hand in hand. The same goes for woodworking. You can create many science experiments in your home with cheap materials like baking soda, dish soap and vinegar. Children's can pursue interests such as art, karate, gymnastics during the day rather than at the end of the day when they are exhausted.
What if we taught our children to be compassionate and gave them tools to succeed socially? Identifying and expressing emotions in a constructive way would be a start, coping with stress and anxiety, communicating with peers and adults in a positive way, learning to respect the boundaries of others while creating and enforcing their own. There is so much to learn in life and much of the important skills that make our children into good citizens are not taught. Why is that?
My friend Chris, who is from BC, told me about the elementary school she went to, an agricultural school where farming was included in the curriculum. That is genius! Is anyone else feeling that need to make education hands-on? I have the vision but I have no clue where to start. I'd love to hear some suggestions.
Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org
A few days ago, I saw a post on Facebook that truly inspired me. I have these fantasies about homeschooling my girls and traveling as a family. I love their school. They have awesome teachers. I have no problems with their experience at school. If they are going to attend school, KPS is my number one choice. However, both my girls beg me to stay home on a weekly, sometimes daily basis. Why? They are both introverts. They hate crowds and loud noises. They feel drained by the end of the day, not from the physical exertion but the strain of togetherness when what they really want is some quite time to draw, read, think and be.
Here is the quote that got me thinking:
"What if... instead of worrying about whether we should give kids gold stars for participating or gold stars for being the best, we involve kids in real world activities where the end result of the activity itself is the reward? Teach them gardening, woodworking, repair skills, fibre arts, sewing, cooking, get them out hiking somewhere with a gorgeous view. Raise animals and have them learn to care about something other than themselves. Have them help out a grandparent or elderly neighbour. Our society has lost sight of what's truly important in life. It's time to find it again". (Grow Food, Not Lawns).
I am convinced that our children would benefit from applying the knowledge they need to retain rather than trying to master information long enough to pass a test. What they learn in school is so abstract. When are they going to use long division? If they spend time in nature, learning about trees, plants, insects and animals, they will naturally feel more grounded and be inclined to protect the environment because they have a relationship with nature, they'll want to preserve it.
I have witnessed the detrimental effect of the school's health curriculum on preteens. We are so focused on avoiding child obesity that we are creating a generation of young girls who count calories and compare the size of their thighs, worrying that they will become obese. Why not teach them how to grow healthy food and eat fruits and veggies? There are no labels and packaging when you shop in your garden or greenhouse. How empowering would it be for children to learn how to prepare tasty, healthy food?
Math can be applied to every day situations from having a budget and shopping for food together, clipping coupons, comparing prices to find the best deal, paying bills, donating to charity and saving up for something special. Cooking and geometry go hand in hand. The same goes for woodworking. You can create many science experiments in your home with cheap materials like baking soda, dish soap and vinegar. Children's can pursue interests such as art, karate, gymnastics during the day rather than at the end of the day when they are exhausted.
What if we taught our children to be compassionate and gave them tools to succeed socially? Identifying and expressing emotions in a constructive way would be a start, coping with stress and anxiety, communicating with peers and adults in a positive way, learning to respect the boundaries of others while creating and enforcing their own. There is so much to learn in life and much of the important skills that make our children into good citizens are not taught. Why is that?
My friend Chris, who is from BC, told me about the elementary school she went to, an agricultural school where farming was included in the curriculum. That is genius! Is anyone else feeling that need to make education hands-on? I have the vision but I have no clue where to start. I'd love to hear some suggestions.
Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org
Wednesday, 7 September 2016
Male Role Models
September 7th, 2016
My husband and I were discussing the importance of strong and multiple male role models this morning. Both of our daughters have one male and one female teacher this year, a first. I am thrilled! I think we naturally have lots of female role models. Our caregivers are often women-stay-at-home moms, grandmas, aunts, cousins then, as we leave home, babysitters or daycare staff are mostly women, at school we have predominantly female teachers and, at the doctor or dentist's office, we see female receptionists, nurses and doctors.
Growing up, I didn't have a father. I was lucky that my grandfather retired when I was quite young so we spent a lot of time together, going to the park or visiting relatives. My grandfather was very quiet and polite. He always took his hat off in the presence of a lady and he had a wicked sense of humour. I also had an uncle who treated me like one of his own. He was hard working and successful. He grew up in a poor family and created his own wealth. I respected him for that. Finally, my Godfather became involved in my life as I started University. He is very intellectual and he liked to challenge me, teaching me to think for myself. He was a very spiritual man, not in a preachy way. Each of these men provided a role model. This was important because I ended up marrying a man with my Grandpa's sense of humour, my Uncle's work ethic and my Godfather's intellect.
My husband grew up without a positive male role model. He once told me the men in his family were weak. His father decided he didn't much like children once he'd had one. He was violent to his mom and neglected the children. When my husband saw his dad, he was visiting briefly, just long enough to beat his mom and get her pregnant. Then, he would disappear again. He decided from an early age to do the opposite of what his father had done. Whenever he is faced with a decision, he wonders what his father would do then he goes in the complete opposite direction. My husband had a strong female role mother, his grandmother. She taught him how it feels to be loved. He owes his confidence and success to her. She was a hard worker and he endeavoured to be just like her. That is how he came to be the successful entrepreneur that he is today. However, when he became my husband and, just over a year later, a father, he was lost. How does a husband behave on a daily basis? What do fathers do with their children? We have worked through this together. I wasn't much help because I didn't live with a man during my childhood. We made up our own routines and he developed his own way of fathering through trial and error.
I am happy that my daughters will have two more role models in their lives. Both male teachers have excellent reputations and are quite popular among students. They also have a third male teacher who has taught gym over the past two years but he only sees them for an hour, three times per week. Still, he is yet another example of what a man can be like. Our conversation this morning was about the impact of these teachers on the young boys at that school. There are so many boys growing up without a decent male role model. The father has left or was never around, the parents are divorced and the father gets little to no time them. These boys are surrounded by women at home, daycare and school. How can we expect them to grow into strong, confident young men if they have no guidance? I can just imagine how powerful an excellent male teacher can be to these young men.
Here's to all the teachers, male and female who become powerful templates for our children. Thank you!
Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org
My husband and I were discussing the importance of strong and multiple male role models this morning. Both of our daughters have one male and one female teacher this year, a first. I am thrilled! I think we naturally have lots of female role models. Our caregivers are often women-stay-at-home moms, grandmas, aunts, cousins then, as we leave home, babysitters or daycare staff are mostly women, at school we have predominantly female teachers and, at the doctor or dentist's office, we see female receptionists, nurses and doctors.
Growing up, I didn't have a father. I was lucky that my grandfather retired when I was quite young so we spent a lot of time together, going to the park or visiting relatives. My grandfather was very quiet and polite. He always took his hat off in the presence of a lady and he had a wicked sense of humour. I also had an uncle who treated me like one of his own. He was hard working and successful. He grew up in a poor family and created his own wealth. I respected him for that. Finally, my Godfather became involved in my life as I started University. He is very intellectual and he liked to challenge me, teaching me to think for myself. He was a very spiritual man, not in a preachy way. Each of these men provided a role model. This was important because I ended up marrying a man with my Grandpa's sense of humour, my Uncle's work ethic and my Godfather's intellect.
My husband grew up without a positive male role model. He once told me the men in his family were weak. His father decided he didn't much like children once he'd had one. He was violent to his mom and neglected the children. When my husband saw his dad, he was visiting briefly, just long enough to beat his mom and get her pregnant. Then, he would disappear again. He decided from an early age to do the opposite of what his father had done. Whenever he is faced with a decision, he wonders what his father would do then he goes in the complete opposite direction. My husband had a strong female role mother, his grandmother. She taught him how it feels to be loved. He owes his confidence and success to her. She was a hard worker and he endeavoured to be just like her. That is how he came to be the successful entrepreneur that he is today. However, when he became my husband and, just over a year later, a father, he was lost. How does a husband behave on a daily basis? What do fathers do with their children? We have worked through this together. I wasn't much help because I didn't live with a man during my childhood. We made up our own routines and he developed his own way of fathering through trial and error.
I am happy that my daughters will have two more role models in their lives. Both male teachers have excellent reputations and are quite popular among students. They also have a third male teacher who has taught gym over the past two years but he only sees them for an hour, three times per week. Still, he is yet another example of what a man can be like. Our conversation this morning was about the impact of these teachers on the young boys at that school. There are so many boys growing up without a decent male role model. The father has left or was never around, the parents are divorced and the father gets little to no time them. These boys are surrounded by women at home, daycare and school. How can we expect them to grow into strong, confident young men if they have no guidance? I can just imagine how powerful an excellent male teacher can be to these young men.
Here's to all the teachers, male and female who become powerful templates for our children. Thank you!
Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org
Wednesday, 29 June 2016
Failure
June 29th, 2016
From a very young age, we learn to compare ourselves to others. Are we taller, a faster runner, more popular, smarter than our peers? At school, we are rewarded for understanding quickly and repeating what we have learned. As we grow up, our parents, the media and community bombard us with messages regarding what it means to be successful. We might go to school longer to become the professionals our parents want us to be. We might work long hours to buy the big house and the ultra expensive sports car. We may use credit cards to pay for holidays we can't afford. We do this to look and feel successful.
In my work, I see people who are struggling with a sense of failure. After a divorce, many women feel like they have failed. Some will say that they should have left years earlier but they feared what others would say and think.
Mothers with teenagers come and see me because they feel that they have failed as a mother. Their previously loving and affectionate daughters no longer speak to them. Everything the moms say or do to bridge the gap that is ever widening only creates conflict. Their child is acting up and they fear that it's all their fault.
When clients come into my studio after they have been laid off, they are feeling shocked and disoriented. They climbed that social ladder and reached an acceptable status. When they suddenly find themselves further down the ladder, they feel like they have failed. It is a blow to their self-esteem.
We learn to avoid failure at all costs but failing is essential to our growth. We are here to experience life. If we fear participating in life because we don't ever want to fail, we end up not reaching our full potential. A comfortable life is not challenging therefore we don't learn anything new about others, about life and about ourselves.
When we fail, we get to receive love and support from our friends and family. These experiences show us who our true friends are and strengthen our relationships. Failing shuts doors so we might explore new avenues we never would have considered otherwise. When we fail in business, it can redirect us to a second career that is more compatible with our personality.
You don't know what you are capable of until you have experienced hardship. When you reach rock bottom, you have a choice-give up or get back up. What you decide teaches you something about your character. Failing also makes you more compassionate. When others are struggling, you can relate, you've been there. You know what others did that helped you pull through and you recall the things people said or did that just made it worst. This prepares you to support others to the best of your abilities.
If you have recently failed at something, ask yourself these questions:
1-On a scale of 1-10, how important will this seem to me in ten years from now? Will I still care?
2-What does this failure mean to me? What does it represent?
3-What story am I creating about this failure and where did this story originate?
4-Is this part of a pattern? Have I been here before? When did this pattern start? What needs healing?
5-How can I love myself today? What simple act of self-care can I perform to support myself?
6-What is the message in this failure? What is it meant to teach me?
7-Is there anything in my control that I can do to move forward today?
8-Who are the people I can reach out to, who love and support me?
Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org
From a very young age, we learn to compare ourselves to others. Are we taller, a faster runner, more popular, smarter than our peers? At school, we are rewarded for understanding quickly and repeating what we have learned. As we grow up, our parents, the media and community bombard us with messages regarding what it means to be successful. We might go to school longer to become the professionals our parents want us to be. We might work long hours to buy the big house and the ultra expensive sports car. We may use credit cards to pay for holidays we can't afford. We do this to look and feel successful.
In my work, I see people who are struggling with a sense of failure. After a divorce, many women feel like they have failed. Some will say that they should have left years earlier but they feared what others would say and think.
Mothers with teenagers come and see me because they feel that they have failed as a mother. Their previously loving and affectionate daughters no longer speak to them. Everything the moms say or do to bridge the gap that is ever widening only creates conflict. Their child is acting up and they fear that it's all their fault.
When clients come into my studio after they have been laid off, they are feeling shocked and disoriented. They climbed that social ladder and reached an acceptable status. When they suddenly find themselves further down the ladder, they feel like they have failed. It is a blow to their self-esteem.
We learn to avoid failure at all costs but failing is essential to our growth. We are here to experience life. If we fear participating in life because we don't ever want to fail, we end up not reaching our full potential. A comfortable life is not challenging therefore we don't learn anything new about others, about life and about ourselves.
When we fail, we get to receive love and support from our friends and family. These experiences show us who our true friends are and strengthen our relationships. Failing shuts doors so we might explore new avenues we never would have considered otherwise. When we fail in business, it can redirect us to a second career that is more compatible with our personality.
You don't know what you are capable of until you have experienced hardship. When you reach rock bottom, you have a choice-give up or get back up. What you decide teaches you something about your character. Failing also makes you more compassionate. When others are struggling, you can relate, you've been there. You know what others did that helped you pull through and you recall the things people said or did that just made it worst. This prepares you to support others to the best of your abilities.
If you have recently failed at something, ask yourself these questions:
1-On a scale of 1-10, how important will this seem to me in ten years from now? Will I still care?
2-What does this failure mean to me? What does it represent?
3-What story am I creating about this failure and where did this story originate?
4-Is this part of a pattern? Have I been here before? When did this pattern start? What needs healing?
5-How can I love myself today? What simple act of self-care can I perform to support myself?
6-What is the message in this failure? What is it meant to teach me?
7-Is there anything in my control that I can do to move forward today?
8-Who are the people I can reach out to, who love and support me?
Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org
Wednesday, 11 May 2016
Book of the Week-The Happiness Equation by Neil Pasricha
May 11th, 2016
Prior to our trip, I ran out of time to go into town and purchase a book. The Happiness Equation caught my eye on a table at Walmart. It's a thick and heavy book, impractical for a trip but it appealed to me and I purchased it anyways.
I like to read when the Vincent and the girls have gone to bed. I curl up on the couch with a cosy blanket, enjoying the quiet. This book had me hooked from the start. It's filled with quirky little diagrams and observations.
Neil talks about this community that lives long, healthy, happy lives. The key is "Ikigai". They all have a sense of purpose, a reason to get up every day. I started to think about my Ikigai. My daughters are mine-loving them, nurturing them and teaching them the important stuff in life. What is your Ikigai?
The author then divides the week into three buckets of 56 hours: one for sleep, one for work and a third to pursue our passion. I was impressed with this, 56 hours per week to pursue my passion. That sounds like a lot! My passions are learning, reading, teaching, creating, writing, public speaking and offering art therapy workshops to children and adults.
In the book, Neil describes how being at work provides social interaction, structure, intellectual stimulation and a story (you are part of the company's story re: who they are and what they are trying to accomplish). He explains how our delusions about retirement being the golden years where we get to do nothing rob us of the four Ss (social, structure, stimulation and story). We are meant to keep working and if we love what we do then it doesn't feel like work.
He believes happiness is only 10% affected by our circumstances, the other 90% comes from our perception. He explains that we pursue success thinking it will make us happy but we need to focus on our happiness first. Neil differentiates between three types of success: making money, earning the respect of others and, feeling proud of ourselves. As long as we depend on others to feel successful, our achievements will never be enough. That's why it's so important to find our bliss and dive in, then we can feel fulfilled.
We are encouraged to achieve a more balanced life by dividing our time evenly between doing and resting. In order to make time to think, Neil recommends we limit the number of choices we make every day to avoid decision fatigue and use that energy constructively. He also believes we need tighter deadlines so we have no time to procrastinate. One of the ways he did this was having 5 minute speeches at his meetings. That way people would get to the point. Everyone felt that their time was well spent. He also proposes having some down time where you can not be reached or distracted so you can just feed your brain.
My favourite part of the book was the three tests on page 245. The point of these tests is to find your authentic self. The tests consist of three questions:
1) What would you do on a Saturday morning if you had no obligations (you are completely free to do what you'd like)?
2) How do you feel when you put yourself in a new situation?
3) Who are the five people closest to you and what do you love most about them?
Neil says the five regrets of the dying are all related to authenticity. It's important to be true to yourself in order to live a happy life. What keeps us from being authentic? Fear. That is why we are encouraged to take action every day. Is there something we can do, even something small to move towards happiness ad fulfillment? Do it. The more we do, the more confident we become in our ability to get things done.
This book really got me thinking and moving in the right direction. Here is another question for you to consider...If you did not need any money, what would you do with your time? Where would you be? Who would you spend time with? What activities would you continue to pursue? Can you find a way to bring this into your life now?
Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org
Prior to our trip, I ran out of time to go into town and purchase a book. The Happiness Equation caught my eye on a table at Walmart. It's a thick and heavy book, impractical for a trip but it appealed to me and I purchased it anyways.
I like to read when the Vincent and the girls have gone to bed. I curl up on the couch with a cosy blanket, enjoying the quiet. This book had me hooked from the start. It's filled with quirky little diagrams and observations.
Neil talks about this community that lives long, healthy, happy lives. The key is "Ikigai". They all have a sense of purpose, a reason to get up every day. I started to think about my Ikigai. My daughters are mine-loving them, nurturing them and teaching them the important stuff in life. What is your Ikigai?
The author then divides the week into three buckets of 56 hours: one for sleep, one for work and a third to pursue our passion. I was impressed with this, 56 hours per week to pursue my passion. That sounds like a lot! My passions are learning, reading, teaching, creating, writing, public speaking and offering art therapy workshops to children and adults.
In the book, Neil describes how being at work provides social interaction, structure, intellectual stimulation and a story (you are part of the company's story re: who they are and what they are trying to accomplish). He explains how our delusions about retirement being the golden years where we get to do nothing rob us of the four Ss (social, structure, stimulation and story). We are meant to keep working and if we love what we do then it doesn't feel like work.
He believes happiness is only 10% affected by our circumstances, the other 90% comes from our perception. He explains that we pursue success thinking it will make us happy but we need to focus on our happiness first. Neil differentiates between three types of success: making money, earning the respect of others and, feeling proud of ourselves. As long as we depend on others to feel successful, our achievements will never be enough. That's why it's so important to find our bliss and dive in, then we can feel fulfilled.
We are encouraged to achieve a more balanced life by dividing our time evenly between doing and resting. In order to make time to think, Neil recommends we limit the number of choices we make every day to avoid decision fatigue and use that energy constructively. He also believes we need tighter deadlines so we have no time to procrastinate. One of the ways he did this was having 5 minute speeches at his meetings. That way people would get to the point. Everyone felt that their time was well spent. He also proposes having some down time where you can not be reached or distracted so you can just feed your brain.
My favourite part of the book was the three tests on page 245. The point of these tests is to find your authentic self. The tests consist of three questions:
1) What would you do on a Saturday morning if you had no obligations (you are completely free to do what you'd like)?
2) How do you feel when you put yourself in a new situation?
3) Who are the five people closest to you and what do you love most about them?
Neil says the five regrets of the dying are all related to authenticity. It's important to be true to yourself in order to live a happy life. What keeps us from being authentic? Fear. That is why we are encouraged to take action every day. Is there something we can do, even something small to move towards happiness ad fulfillment? Do it. The more we do, the more confident we become in our ability to get things done.
This book really got me thinking and moving in the right direction. Here is another question for you to consider...If you did not need any money, what would you do with your time? Where would you be? Who would you spend time with? What activities would you continue to pursue? Can you find a way to bring this into your life now?
Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org
Tuesday, 10 May 2016
Back to Reality and Business is Booming!
May 10th, 2016
I'm back! I can't believe how long it has been since my last post. My intention was to resume my writing yesterday, a Monday. My husband offered to take our daughters to gymnastics and I felt it was the best opportunity to sit and write. Then, one hour later, he and the girls were on their way home. Our eldest was throwing up. There would be no gymnastics and, no writing.
I took a break from writing when I left for a two week trip with my family to Florida. We always book a home through Vacation Rentals By Owners (VRBO). We had a great time together. For my husband, the best thing is grilling and going out on the motorbike. For our daughters it's not being in school and spending most of the day in the pool. For me, it's the warmth, wearing a thin layer of clothing, walking barefoot and just hanging out with my family.
I fully expected to start writing the Monday after we returned however...
The first thing that happened was putting out the garbage that first night back at the house and freezing. I could feel all my muscles trembling. I got sick. I felt worn out, my nose was constantly dripping and my entire head was congested. I accomplished nothing that first week back.
I was scheduled to participate in the North Grenville Sustainability Fair the next weekend. My body was on the mend and I prepared boxes of art materials to inspire children to create a village with butcher paper, cardboard boxes, paints, markers, duct tape, popsicle sticks and cotton balls. A young boy and his little sister discovered my three tables set up in the far corner and they jumped in. They invited others to join the fun and, next thing I knew, my corner was super busy and the village was taking shape. It was an exciting afternoon and I was very proud of the outcome.
The fair was on the Sunday. I was relaxing, eating my breakfast on Monday morning when I realized the Catholic District School Board was having its Community Partner Day in one hour. I had totally forgotten about it. The date had been set such a long time ago. I jumped in the shower and drove to Smiths Falls as fast as I could. It was so worth it! I made great contacts, handed out many cards and learned about opportunities to get involved with the school board.
For the following three weeks, I had one workshop with parents and their children, each week, at Kemptville Public School. The Parent Council applied for a Parents Reaching Out grant on my behalf. Therefore, I was able to offer three 90 minute sessions to families for free on the topic of communication. We created family sculptures on the first week to define each family's identity. Then, for the second session, we explored our aliens and learned how to communicate emotions in a constructive way. The final and third week had families create wish boxes to plan quality activities together. I was thrilled with the turn out. I received excellent feedback from the families and the parent council. It was such a great opportunity for me to showcase what I do. To top it all off, another school has contacted me. They heard about my workshops and will be applying for funding to have me offer those same workshops at their school in the Fall. Life is good!
I was also in contact with Tim Gordon at Burnstown Publishing. They will be printing 50 copies of my Have You Hugged Your Alien? book as well as 50 copies of my new book, The Story of Poobum and Pompom. I am so happy to have my second book on its way. I believe the book is going to the printers tomorrow. We have been e-mailing back and forth to sort through details and ensure the book is a success. I am now organizing my book launch for early June. All very exciting stuff!
Throughout this busy time, each of my family members has been sick. I was sick the first week back, then my youngest, then my husband and now, as I sit here and write, my eldest daughter is ill as well.
I love writing and I will now pick up where I left off. However, I have decided to not write on weekends. I was struggling to get my writing done on weekends before because, from Friday evening to Sunday night, I am surrounded by family. I get stressed because I am torn between two intentions, writing every day and spending quality time with my loved ones. I believe that keeping my writing to weekdays, will help me balance out my life.
Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org
I'm back! I can't believe how long it has been since my last post. My intention was to resume my writing yesterday, a Monday. My husband offered to take our daughters to gymnastics and I felt it was the best opportunity to sit and write. Then, one hour later, he and the girls were on their way home. Our eldest was throwing up. There would be no gymnastics and, no writing.
I took a break from writing when I left for a two week trip with my family to Florida. We always book a home through Vacation Rentals By Owners (VRBO). We had a great time together. For my husband, the best thing is grilling and going out on the motorbike. For our daughters it's not being in school and spending most of the day in the pool. For me, it's the warmth, wearing a thin layer of clothing, walking barefoot and just hanging out with my family.
I fully expected to start writing the Monday after we returned however...
The first thing that happened was putting out the garbage that first night back at the house and freezing. I could feel all my muscles trembling. I got sick. I felt worn out, my nose was constantly dripping and my entire head was congested. I accomplished nothing that first week back.
I was scheduled to participate in the North Grenville Sustainability Fair the next weekend. My body was on the mend and I prepared boxes of art materials to inspire children to create a village with butcher paper, cardboard boxes, paints, markers, duct tape, popsicle sticks and cotton balls. A young boy and his little sister discovered my three tables set up in the far corner and they jumped in. They invited others to join the fun and, next thing I knew, my corner was super busy and the village was taking shape. It was an exciting afternoon and I was very proud of the outcome.
The fair was on the Sunday. I was relaxing, eating my breakfast on Monday morning when I realized the Catholic District School Board was having its Community Partner Day in one hour. I had totally forgotten about it. The date had been set such a long time ago. I jumped in the shower and drove to Smiths Falls as fast as I could. It was so worth it! I made great contacts, handed out many cards and learned about opportunities to get involved with the school board.
For the following three weeks, I had one workshop with parents and their children, each week, at Kemptville Public School. The Parent Council applied for a Parents Reaching Out grant on my behalf. Therefore, I was able to offer three 90 minute sessions to families for free on the topic of communication. We created family sculptures on the first week to define each family's identity. Then, for the second session, we explored our aliens and learned how to communicate emotions in a constructive way. The final and third week had families create wish boxes to plan quality activities together. I was thrilled with the turn out. I received excellent feedback from the families and the parent council. It was such a great opportunity for me to showcase what I do. To top it all off, another school has contacted me. They heard about my workshops and will be applying for funding to have me offer those same workshops at their school in the Fall. Life is good!
I was also in contact with Tim Gordon at Burnstown Publishing. They will be printing 50 copies of my Have You Hugged Your Alien? book as well as 50 copies of my new book, The Story of Poobum and Pompom. I am so happy to have my second book on its way. I believe the book is going to the printers tomorrow. We have been e-mailing back and forth to sort through details and ensure the book is a success. I am now organizing my book launch for early June. All very exciting stuff!
Throughout this busy time, each of my family members has been sick. I was sick the first week back, then my youngest, then my husband and now, as I sit here and write, my eldest daughter is ill as well.
I love writing and I will now pick up where I left off. However, I have decided to not write on weekends. I was struggling to get my writing done on weekends before because, from Friday evening to Sunday night, I am surrounded by family. I get stressed because I am torn between two intentions, writing every day and spending quality time with my loved ones. I believe that keeping my writing to weekdays, will help me balance out my life.
Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org
Sunday, 31 January 2016
Date Night
January 31st
Just over ten years ago, Vincent and I became parents. Our youngest daughter's Godparents, the Braidecs, were at my husband's shop. They were celebrating their wedding anniversary. I can't remember which anniversary it was but they have been together a long time, with two happy, successful, adult children. I asked them for the secret to a long marriage. I was expecting something like communication, compassion, humour etc, the usuals. They said they always made a point of having a date, once a week. This can be challenging when the children are young but it's important.
To this day, Vincent and I have our date night every week. I truly do believe it has helped us stay connected through the tough times. When you have children, you form a triangle and, although you can all interact as a family, the focus of both parents is usually directed to the child. When you try to communicate as a couple, within the home, you can be interrupted so many times you never finish any of the topics. This can lead to frustration, miscommunication and alienation.
Also, because it's easy to get sucked into a routine where each partner has a role, unless a couple gets out of the house without children on a regular basis, when they finally end up alone together, they may no longer know how to connect. They suddenly feel like strangers and have nothing to say. Our dates allowed us to stay romantic. I would dress up every week. The girls loved watching me get changed out of my "mommy" clothes. They always suggested which dress to wear. It shows them what it's like to care for someone and want special time with them. They saw us as a united couple who went out and had fun together.
During our date nights, we could have fun, laugh about whatever had happened during the week or just enjoy each other's company the way we did before we became parents. Sometimes, when we were stressed and overwhelmed by our responsibilities, we might take each other for granted and communicate in gruff ways throughout the week. It was nice to go out and realize we were ok. Taken away from the context of "duties", our pace would resume and we could see beyond the stress of the week.
On a few occasions, we vented our frustrations in the car on the way to the restaurant. We could get everything out without worrying that the children could hear. We might stay in the car longer than anticipated but, in the end, we had cleared the air and we were able to progress. Going out regularly means you don't forget what it's like to enjoy being your spouse's partner. We have had amazing conversations in the car and at the restaurant. We are able to talk about what is happening in our life, what we have learned, what our goals are for the future etc.
Even though there were weeks that the girls begged me to stay home with them when they were younger, they now look forward to our date night because they love their babysitter, Lauren. When they were very young, our date may be the only outing I got all week. It felt good to dress up and enjoy my supper while it was still warm, to feel like a woman. We became regulars in some restaurants and developed friendships with wait staff, managers and restaurant owners. It was fun to get out, socialize and have a good laugh.
Our sense of humour has always been a big part of our relationship. Spending time together, relaxing, eating good food, chatting, joking around, holding hands, even kissing on the way to the car, all of it has helped to keep our relationship fresh and fun.
If you have young children and you need to bring some joy back in your life, follow these steps:
1-Make date night a priority.
2-Find reliable, responsible people to babysit. If you have no money to pay for a sitter, see if a friend with children will trade with you so they can go out as well. You could also eat at home after you put the kids to bed so you can talk and have a date alone.
3-You don't need to go somewhere fancy. Tim Hortons and Subway can work just as well as a fancy restaurant. The point is to have time together.
4-Don't use this time to complain, go over the honey-do list or stress out about bills. All of this can be done during the drive there if you absolutely need to discuss it. Once you get to the restaurant, switch to date mode.
5-Dress up for your date so you can feel sexy. Don't forget to notice how good your partner looks.
6-Take the opportunity to hold hands, sit close together and cuddle.
7-Don't invite others to join you unless you have other opportunities to go out together alone.
Enjoy!
Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org
Just over ten years ago, Vincent and I became parents. Our youngest daughter's Godparents, the Braidecs, were at my husband's shop. They were celebrating their wedding anniversary. I can't remember which anniversary it was but they have been together a long time, with two happy, successful, adult children. I asked them for the secret to a long marriage. I was expecting something like communication, compassion, humour etc, the usuals. They said they always made a point of having a date, once a week. This can be challenging when the children are young but it's important.
To this day, Vincent and I have our date night every week. I truly do believe it has helped us stay connected through the tough times. When you have children, you form a triangle and, although you can all interact as a family, the focus of both parents is usually directed to the child. When you try to communicate as a couple, within the home, you can be interrupted so many times you never finish any of the topics. This can lead to frustration, miscommunication and alienation.
Also, because it's easy to get sucked into a routine where each partner has a role, unless a couple gets out of the house without children on a regular basis, when they finally end up alone together, they may no longer know how to connect. They suddenly feel like strangers and have nothing to say. Our dates allowed us to stay romantic. I would dress up every week. The girls loved watching me get changed out of my "mommy" clothes. They always suggested which dress to wear. It shows them what it's like to care for someone and want special time with them. They saw us as a united couple who went out and had fun together.
During our date nights, we could have fun, laugh about whatever had happened during the week or just enjoy each other's company the way we did before we became parents. Sometimes, when we were stressed and overwhelmed by our responsibilities, we might take each other for granted and communicate in gruff ways throughout the week. It was nice to go out and realize we were ok. Taken away from the context of "duties", our pace would resume and we could see beyond the stress of the week.
On a few occasions, we vented our frustrations in the car on the way to the restaurant. We could get everything out without worrying that the children could hear. We might stay in the car longer than anticipated but, in the end, we had cleared the air and we were able to progress. Going out regularly means you don't forget what it's like to enjoy being your spouse's partner. We have had amazing conversations in the car and at the restaurant. We are able to talk about what is happening in our life, what we have learned, what our goals are for the future etc.
Even though there were weeks that the girls begged me to stay home with them when they were younger, they now look forward to our date night because they love their babysitter, Lauren. When they were very young, our date may be the only outing I got all week. It felt good to dress up and enjoy my supper while it was still warm, to feel like a woman. We became regulars in some restaurants and developed friendships with wait staff, managers and restaurant owners. It was fun to get out, socialize and have a good laugh.
Our sense of humour has always been a big part of our relationship. Spending time together, relaxing, eating good food, chatting, joking around, holding hands, even kissing on the way to the car, all of it has helped to keep our relationship fresh and fun.
If you have young children and you need to bring some joy back in your life, follow these steps:
1-Make date night a priority.
2-Find reliable, responsible people to babysit. If you have no money to pay for a sitter, see if a friend with children will trade with you so they can go out as well. You could also eat at home after you put the kids to bed so you can talk and have a date alone.
3-You don't need to go somewhere fancy. Tim Hortons and Subway can work just as well as a fancy restaurant. The point is to have time together.
4-Don't use this time to complain, go over the honey-do list or stress out about bills. All of this can be done during the drive there if you absolutely need to discuss it. Once you get to the restaurant, switch to date mode.
5-Dress up for your date so you can feel sexy. Don't forget to notice how good your partner looks.
6-Take the opportunity to hold hands, sit close together and cuddle.
7-Don't invite others to join you unless you have other opportunities to go out together alone.
Enjoy!
Anne Walsh
www.artnsoul.org
Friday, 15 January 2016
Book of the Week-Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear
January 15th, 2016
Big Magic was on my wish list this Christmas. However, there was some confusion and I ended up with, The Magic Strings of Frankie Presto which is not usually my type of book but I thoroughly enjoyed it. It is beautifully written and I couldn't put it down until it was done. It made me want to pick up a guitar and learn to play Flamenco. Then I started reading Diana Leeson Fisher's new book, The Accidental Farmwife and, just like that, the urge to devote myself to Flamenco music died. I had moved on. Diana's book revived my dream of owning chickens, a goat and a vegetable garden.
Last week, I went to Indigo Books in Barrhaven with my girls and bought Big Magic. I was eager to read it and gain some new wisdom or tips I could integrate into my workshops. The book wasn't what I expected. I read it in its entirety and many parts made me laugh but it's an unusual book. It feels like a pep talk or motivational speech for writers. Basically, the author explains that we all have a treasure buried deep within us that we can choose to unearth. She encourages the reader to write for the pleasure of it and not take it so seriously. She describes the way a creative calling or idea comes your way and waits for your collaboration. If you ignore it, it will keep going until someone else produces the exact same thing and you think: "That was my idea". The author, Elizabeth Gilbert, warns the reader to avoid the common mistake of believing that you must suffer for your art. She assures us that it is possible to enjoy, and surrender to, the process. She also instructs artists to follow their curiosity rather than wait for a deep passion to emerge. The goal is to stay busy and keep moving. When she feels stuck, she may pursue a new interest and find that her creative flow has returned.
The section that was most inspirational to me was devoted to an artist's work ethic. Elizabeth has pledged that she will write throughout her life no matter what: success, failure, lack of inspiration, no motivation etc. She doesn't "burden" her art with the expectation to make a living. Therefore she worked other jobs for money while she continued to write until the success of Eat, Pray, Love. This was a new way of perceiving my passion. Much of what I do: write and publish children's books, offer workshops to children or to women in their 40s, 50s and 60s, interview people for the local paper and write this blog, feeds my soul. I thoroughly enjoy all of it. I become conflicted when I try to earn a certain amount of money from my work. Then, the success of the work is determined by my pay as opposed to my sense of purpose. It may be worthwhile to work for money during the day at a stress-free job and enjoy my calling in the evenings and weekends, unconcerned with the financial aspect of these endeavours. Food for thought!
Big Magic was on my wish list this Christmas. However, there was some confusion and I ended up with, The Magic Strings of Frankie Presto which is not usually my type of book but I thoroughly enjoyed it. It is beautifully written and I couldn't put it down until it was done. It made me want to pick up a guitar and learn to play Flamenco. Then I started reading Diana Leeson Fisher's new book, The Accidental Farmwife and, just like that, the urge to devote myself to Flamenco music died. I had moved on. Diana's book revived my dream of owning chickens, a goat and a vegetable garden.
Last week, I went to Indigo Books in Barrhaven with my girls and bought Big Magic. I was eager to read it and gain some new wisdom or tips I could integrate into my workshops. The book wasn't what I expected. I read it in its entirety and many parts made me laugh but it's an unusual book. It feels like a pep talk or motivational speech for writers. Basically, the author explains that we all have a treasure buried deep within us that we can choose to unearth. She encourages the reader to write for the pleasure of it and not take it so seriously. She describes the way a creative calling or idea comes your way and waits for your collaboration. If you ignore it, it will keep going until someone else produces the exact same thing and you think: "That was my idea". The author, Elizabeth Gilbert, warns the reader to avoid the common mistake of believing that you must suffer for your art. She assures us that it is possible to enjoy, and surrender to, the process. She also instructs artists to follow their curiosity rather than wait for a deep passion to emerge. The goal is to stay busy and keep moving. When she feels stuck, she may pursue a new interest and find that her creative flow has returned.
The section that was most inspirational to me was devoted to an artist's work ethic. Elizabeth has pledged that she will write throughout her life no matter what: success, failure, lack of inspiration, no motivation etc. She doesn't "burden" her art with the expectation to make a living. Therefore she worked other jobs for money while she continued to write until the success of Eat, Pray, Love. This was a new way of perceiving my passion. Much of what I do: write and publish children's books, offer workshops to children or to women in their 40s, 50s and 60s, interview people for the local paper and write this blog, feeds my soul. I thoroughly enjoy all of it. I become conflicted when I try to earn a certain amount of money from my work. Then, the success of the work is determined by my pay as opposed to my sense of purpose. It may be worthwhile to work for money during the day at a stress-free job and enjoy my calling in the evenings and weekends, unconcerned with the financial aspect of these endeavours. Food for thought!
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